Our Journey

Happy Birthday in Heaven

2011-11-08T22:27:00.000-07:00

Today would have been my oldest son Keanes 9th birthday, seems almost impossible to beleive that its been 9 years since he was born. Such a miracle to experience his short lived life, I can hardly believe I can now live day to day with out falling into pieces like I did for the first few years. Don't get me wrong, there are still moments of everyday that I think of him, and days where it just hits me hard that he is not here with me.... I can truly say that with time God has helped me learn to live with the constant grief I feel, living without my first born son here on earth.

November 9th, 2002 my first born son Keane Michael was born into this world at 19 1/2 weeks gestation, to small for this world to live here (to read the whole story about his life see my blog post from last year http://myboysmygreatestgiftsinlife.blogspot.com/2009/11/he-would-have-been-7-today.html). His short lived life has changed my life dramatically, and I have learned the lesson of what is important in this world. He was born at 6:12 in the evening weighing 8oz and very much alive :) ! They had told me over and over again for three days ( I went into the ER on November 6th) that he would not be born alive, that the meds they gave me were potent and that he could not survive it...But he did :) The Lord blessed us with the 6 hours he was here on earth.

Today, is a bitter sweet day for me, I'm grateful for the hours I had with my son, but sad that he was taken from us so quickly. I still long to know what his voice sounds like, I still wonder if he still would look exactly like his older brother, I still wonder what his favorite character would have been, would have been been a Thomas crazy boy like Gabriel? Or would he have loved dinasours like Matthias? Would he have been a great singer/sports player?

So many unanswered questions when you have to bury your child after birth. Even as I type this it still makes no sense to me as to why my son was taken to heaven so early. But the only hope I have is knowing that one day I will see him again, and all those questions will be answered for me.

I miss you terribly Keane Michael, you are loved and missed everyday by your family. Your short life has touched so many, and I will forever be grateful for the gift that the Lord gave me with you!

We miss you
HAPPY BIRTHDAY WITH THE ANGELS MY LOVE!

LOVE MOMMY

2006.....Friday, October 13th ........

2011-10-12T20:00:00.000-06:00

The day my sons life and ours, would be forever changed. Back in 2006 I had heard of the word autism, but the only thing I knew about it was that children who had it, would flap their hands and stare off into space, doesn't like to be touched, and rock back and forth. I kept watching Matthias and thinking, he doesn't do ANY of that, and he doesn't push us away, in fact he loves being hugged?? So it can't be autism right???

Well when I was trying to figure out what exactly was wrong with Handsome I read many things that it could be, a hearing problem, different speech disorders,developmental disorders and of course autism. Well in the beginning of this year long process to get a diagnosis I really felt it was just a speech disorder, but I think deep down in my heart I knew....

But the longer it took, the more I kept reading about autism and seeing different symptoms he had. Some things he did I had no idea were signs of autism, playing with toys in appropropriatly, i.e. picking them up letting them fall and watching it while it fell, screaming for no reason at all, waking in the middle of the night and not going back to sleep.... I could go on....

But on this particular day, I remember just like it was yesterday. We loaded him up into the car, drove to down town Phoenix and waited to be seen by a Psychologist. In the waiting room he pointed out different letters he recognized ( pointing was the only thing he could do, he did not speak)_and again I remember thinking see he must be ok.....

We waited for what seemed like hours. It was the same routine I had been through SO many times already, 'Fill out this paper work, stating all his history from birth to current, along with all of my history, his dads history, and all the information about my pregnancies and so on and so forth. After filling out the 15 page booklet :) we went back.

She was a very nice lady and while we were in their she asked us lots of questions while she watched our son play. She pointed out things to me, that I never noticed before, like... " You see how he plays with those blocks, he doesn't play with them the way a child should, he picks them up looks at them and then throws them" Does he have an aversion to certain food textures?.....

After many questions and lots of pointing out of what our son is doing. She sat back and asked me, "How long have you thought something may be wrong?" and I told her " Since he was about 15 months old"

And then she said it, " Unfortunately, I see a lot of this lately...." pause... what seemed like the longest pause of my life...... " Have you ever heard of autism?"

My heart sank " Yes.." and then she said it " Your son has autism.... I would put him in the category of Severe to Moderate, seeing as he is so young he may be able to make some progress" " Unfortunately , there is no cure, with time and therapy he might be able to make some progress and talk, but I can't say for sure what kind of progress he will make. I can tell you that the more intervention you get for him the better it may get." You should learn to accept that he may only progress this far and that's it and just accept him as he is......

Through the fog of crying I heard what she was saying, but was so overcome with fear, grief and disappointment for my son. We sat and listened to her, and took all the paperwork she had for us and she walked us down the hall. I politely excused myself to the restroom, where I completely fell into tears. All I could think of was " How can this be?" Why my son? Haven't we struggled enough already? Why does Handsome have to struggle? What will we do?

I tried desperatley to hold it together for my son, I didn't want to upset him. I was so glad Glenn was there cause Handsome really needed his daddy right then.... AS I was about to walk through the door, I heard the Doctor tell his Dad, this is going to be a rough road, some children progress a little further, but most don't.... you will walk through a lot of feelings, and its okay that she is upset, let her work through it, I"m sorry this has happened, and she left.

I dried my eyes and walked out and held it together, We really didn't say much on the ride home as we both were in shock of it all. Glenn tried his best to reassure me it would be okay, I was just filled with so much grief I could barely speak.....He told me if I needed him he would stay, but I knew he needed to go to work. I felt so bad because I knew he was going through the same feelings I was, but I just couldn't think or speak, I was numb...

I dropped him off, drove down the street parked the car in a grocery store parking lot and called my sister. I remember when she answered the phone I could barely speak, she heard me crying and said " Are you okay? What did they say? Do you need me to come and get you?"

I finally was able to form the words. " Matthias has autism" She told me to come to her store and she would meet me outside, she did and she comforted me and told me it would be okay. I remember finally getting home that night, and putting him to bed and watching him and thinking, whats going to happen to him? How will this ever be ok? I cried for what seems like weeks, but really only allowed myself a few days, and then I dug my feet in and read everything I could!

Even though today its been 5 years since his diagnosis, it still feels like we are new to this whole autism world... it has forever changed our lives, I still grieve for my son and for the life that was stolen from him. I pray for complete recovery for him ever day, but also, the realistic side of me says, this may be as far as he me come... but even if it is, I will STILL fight for his recovery till the day I die. I would move the earth for my boys, and I'm praying one day, the Lord will do so for my sons recovery.

To this day, autism is still an awful word to me, it is NOT who my son is, and I will NEVER accept it. My son was born a normal healthy boy, and because I chose to vaccinate him, he has autism.... his body could not handle the toxic overload and get rid of it, and its still difficult for me to swallow the fact that I willingly handed him over to them. But, because of him, his little brother was saved from it. Because with out a doubt! I know the same thing would have happened to him.

This type of an anniversary is not a good one, the only good thing to come out of a diagnosis like autism, is the fact that you learn to cherish the little things in life, alot more then you ever did before! I'm still praying for my sons recovery and he has made AMAZING progress!!! I'm so proud of you Matthias! and I know you will accomplish great things this year!

All my love!
Mommy

Today........

2011-08-23T20:58:00.000-06:00

I read an article written by a sweet and awesome autism Mom Lisa Goes..... I cried as I read it cause that is me, and was me and I literally did and said many of the same thing she did. The one thing she said that brought me to tears, was this......

"I am so, so sorry, my precious boy. You needed me to protect you. I just believed what I was told. No questions asked. I did not read the MSD sheets they handed me. I...did...not...read...them. I gave them your life when I signed those papers. I went back, over and over again, watching you get sicker and sicker. Sweet, sweet Noah, please forgive me. You matter. Your life matters and I love you more than anything"

Many many nights I said this same thing, to my son Matthias... this article is so powerful, please read it and share, and educate yourself! Don't let autism happen to your son or daughter, I wish I would have known what I do now, because if so, life for Matthias would have been different today. Its so hard even to this day to not blame myself for not knowing, it hurts to know that the one thing I didn't check on because I was told it was safe and what was needed, disabled my son and took his ability to live a normal life away. So because of that I will educate others to my last breath so that they know the truth of what can happen!

Please stop by and read Lisa Goes article and read what life is like ...... http://www.ageofautism.com/2011/08/a-day-in-the-life-of-an-autism-mom-1.html
Much Love,

Trying.............

2011-08-22T09:22:00.000-06:00

To stay positive as progress as gone way down for Matthias, we have hit another platue and not sure how to get past it??? Homeopathy has done some amazing things for Matthias, and I'm glad we took that route, but now as I can not afford another visit, I am wondering what to do next?

Either way, I'm doing what I can from home, filling his body full of great vitamins and good food and doing his therapies. Going to see if we can get another speech therapy session added so he can have two hours a week instead of 1, so keep that in prayer :)

Hi Friends....

2011-07-10T20:39:00.000-06:00

Wow it has been a LONG time since I have posted... Matthias has been doing really well.... he is very very smart and talks up a storm and does great with Math in school :) The remedy has worked very well and he is advancing each and every day!

We still have lots of issues with focusing on things, and lots of stimming and of course the ever so common poop issue :) LOL.... BUT he is completely potty trained!!! :) So happy for him. I never thought it would happen but he did it :) Way to go Handsome!!

He is back in school for extended school year and we are all very happy about this too :) Being out of school is NEVER an easy thing for him.

We still have lots of things he has to over come but this little boy has done amazing things and has over come so much in his 7 years of life!

I couldn't be more proud of him :)

Here is to seeing MUCH more progress to come!

Much Love,

New Photo contest

2011-03-16T17:08:00.001-06:00

I entered another photo in the Pix-o-sphere photo contest, stop by and check them out :)

TOOT TOOT....

2011-03-02T20:48:00.000-07:00

The progress Train keeps ROLLING ALONG :) I know its been awhile, but thought I would post a quick update on Handsomes progress! First I can't begin to tell you how floored I am at the progress he has made not only in the last two years, but in the last, almost 5 years since his diagnosis. He is such a hard worker, and has worked so hard to get where he is at! We are so proud of you Handsome!!!!

Since we started Homeopathy in October, he has gone from taking a HUGE amount of supplements a day, to just taking normal daily vitamins and flaxseed oil to help keep him regular. He is almost completely potty trained and I know it will be very soon that he will be completely potty trained! He talks in such huge sentences and just tonight, told me, OWE Mommy that hurt, when I accidentally stepped on his toe! Two years ago he NEVER NEVER NEVER would have said a word, he more than likely wouldn't have even cried if it hurt him, but now he responds to it!!!! He loves to tell me when his brother is doing something he shouldn't be. Like tonight, he says " Mommy, Littleman is playing with your shampoo!!, Littleman, Mommy said no playing with her shampoo!" Normally, tattle tailing would annoy most parents, but to us its music to our ears! To be able to hear him communicate anything is a true blessing!!!!

He is much more willing to try new food and just yesterday ate strawberries at school :) and happily came home and reported to me how much he liked them!

We have much less constipation going on as well, and that in itself is a HUGE blessing! Poor Handsome use to be constipated for weeks on end, and now we have experienced it about once a month.

At school academically he is doing great! He is learning his simple addition and can read up a storm! The other day I tried out some simple addition and wrote it out for him and he did it!!! I was so happy I was crying tears of JOY!

Homeopathy is doing wonders for my son! and I would recommend it to the world!

We love you Handsome and are so proud of the progress you are making!

Much Love,

Completely ..........

2011-03-02T11:20:00.000-07:00

FLOORED and HONORED! I just found out one of my pictures I entered in a contest on pixosphere won for Landscapes catagory :) !!! So exciting to be acknowledged! Stop by and check it out!!!

http://www.pixosphere.com/blog/article/1330/February-Winners

Also another one of my pictures was chosen for the home page scroll its one of my brother in law and sister walking up a hill in the fall !

Much Love,
Lisa

Ducky Feet

2011-01-30T20:04:00.000-07:00

Here's another photo I entered at Pix-o-sphere

This is under that catagory Monthly-Feet Titled Little Ducky Feet

I just love, Littlemans duck shoes int his picture :)

Pix-O-Sphere Contest

2011-01-30T19:47:00.000-07:00

I've entered a few pictures over at Pix-o-sphere and here is one of them that I took on our trip to Flagstaff :)

This photo is for the landscape catagory

I just love this picture :) One of my favorites!

365 posts

2011-01-30T19:09:00.000-07:00

I have failed to update my blog with my most recent pictures for the year here are the ones since day 17 :)

BLOWN AWAY

2011-01-28T21:12:00.000-07:00

So, life has been crazy these past few weeks, I am getting ready to go on a trip to be in my friends wedding and also be the photographer :) I'm excited and nervous all at the same time! I digress.... this is the reason I have not posted in awhile.

So here is the progress that Handsome is making :)

Back on the 7th of January we had dosed Handsome with his remedy, and then discovered we were dosing him way to often. SO he went with out his remedy for 3 weeks until yesterday and guess what! Pierre was right, we were dosing way to much and that was why we were seeing some behavior issues ect. BUT the past 3 weeks Handsome has been doing amazing things!!! Here is just a brief glimpse of what my big guy has been doing :

Recently, Handsome has said to me “ Mom look what Littleman is doing!!!” and when I went into the bathroom where they were showering, he was right, he was being naughty :) He is pooping much more often on the potty. He is talking in sentences he has never used before, and just recently he had this convo with his little brother “ “ Leave me alone G” pause “ Mommy, he's touching me!!!!! Leave me alone G!” Then little brother says “ I'm sorry Handsome” and Handsome says “ That's okay G” SUCH music to my ears!!!!!

He has told me he was sorry for screaming and having a meltdown about something after being sent to his room?!?!?! All on HIS OWN!! NO PROMPTING!!

Currently goes into the typical classroom daily for socialization and has made a friend who he really loves! His vocabulary is growing leaps and bounds AND He is adding simple math and really likes it!!! Yay for you Handsome cause Momma has always despised math :)

He shows an interest in playing pretend all the time, whether its with his batman and robin characters or playing with his little brother with his trains. Has helped me set the table several times and asks me if he can help set the table. Is a GREAT helper! He loves to get things that I need, like wipes for his brother, or water for him and even get my purse for me!

Its so amazing the things that are happening with homeopathy! We are so blessed to have been told about homeopathy! I hope you all will give it try some day, you'll be pleasantly surprised for yourself and your children!

Much Love,

Lisa

Day 16

2011-01-16T20:14:00.000-07:00

Day 16 - This kitty's name is also Handsome he belongs to my boyfriends next door neighbor and I adore him!

Day 15

2011-01-16T00:58:00.000-07:00

todays picture was actually taken by my nephew with my camera :) as I was not able to go and take this MOST important picture for today :)

Day 15 - A precious new member to our family my great nephew

Welcome to the world little one!

Day 14

2011-01-15T11:11:00.000-07:00

Day 14 - Beautiful Flowers I received from my boyfriend

Day 12 and 13

2011-01-13T19:37:00.002-07:00

I was miserable yesterday and went to bed early, so i wasn't able to post my picture that I did take yesterday, so here is yesterdays photo and today :)

Day 12 - Thomas and his friends (yes, one is faceless thanks to Littleman )

Day 13 - This place holds a special place in my heart!

Day 11

2011-01-11T23:45:00.000-07:00

Day 11 - Beautiful flowers

Slow but meaningful

2011-01-11T19:49:00.000-07:00

Progress is being made with Handsome...... boy has homeopathy been a completely different ride then biomedical :).... the other day after getting home from our trip up north to take their Grani to Am-Track I realized that he was so zoned out because tada..... He was constipated again :(... seriously this kid is full of it :) lol.... so when we returned home I did the usual and now after he was able to relieve himself he is more focused.

Today he wrote his name all by himself :) This is the first time i have ever seen him do this :) I was so happy for him!!!!

( I know its kind of hard to tell, but it is his name and it wrote it all by himself!!!! )

He also has slept straight through the night with out waking for three days straight :) I'm hoping this trend continues. We are dosing him with his remedy, but NOT often. Pierre wants us to hold back on dosing, some kids do better with frequent dosing and others do well with not so frequent, so I am going to hold of for sometime and see what happens :)

If you can believe it, both my boys birthdays are coming up in the beginning of February!!

I can hardly believe Handsome will be 7 and Littleman will be 3!!! Where has all the time gone??? I am so grateful for my sweet little boys and so blessed by both of their accomplishments.

Someone who is in the autism community is getting ready to let their son rest in peace with the Lord today and my heart just breaks for them. Please pray for this family today, It only reminds me how blessed I am by the progress Handsome has made and for the wonderful blessing of Littleman being a typical little 2 year old. Remember friends, hold your loved ones close and cherish the moments you have.

Much Love,

Day 10

2011-01-10T18:49:00.000-07:00

Here is today's 365 project, I couldn't help but use a picture I took from a few days ago... I just is so glowy and warm :) I did take one for today but I really prefer this one :)

365 day project

2011-01-09T18:59:00.001-07:00

I was out of the city for a few days so I wasn't able to post my pics for each... so here they are :)

Day 5 - Laughter in the snow

Day 6 - Snowy Train Station

Day 7 - Glittery snowy foot prints in the snow

Day 8 - Cabin in the snow

Day 9 - Two of my favorite things! Starbucks and French press Coffee!

Much Love,

365 day project - Day 4

2011-01-04T23:34:00.000-07:00

He's serious about his Thomas!

365 day Project

2011-01-03T20:40:00.000-07:00

So my beautiful friend Amy gave me this idea and I started it a few days ago, but have been so slammed with things to do this week I didn't get to post the last two pictures :).... Here are the first Three days of the 365 day project in pictures :)

Day 1- Happy New Year Sparklers :)

Day 2 - Yep we still have our tree up, it will come down this weekend :(

Day 3 - These little piggies are the two cutest feet in the world!

I'm looking forward to this New Year and having several goals for myself this year, one of them being this project :) I hope your all doing well today and I pray you have a blessed New year!

Much Love,

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.... a little late :)

2010-12-28T11:50:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone!

Life has been crazy this month :) but things have been good :)_ we are seeing great progress with Handsome. We are still struggling with many issues, but he is talking up a storm and playing pretends all the time! I hope you all had a great Christmas celebrating our Lords birth. I pray you all have a blessed New Year as well!

Here are a few pics from Christmas Eve!

Handsome and his cousin Elysha

Opening gifts

Littleman and his cousin Darsha (he was so tired and cranky when we opened gifts :) lol )

The boys and their cousins Jose, Desiree, Nathan, Elysha and Darsha

BUSY BUSY BUSY............

2010-12-19T10:58:00.000-07:00

The past few weeks have been full of memories, picture taking and busy times before Christmas. Yesterday I was blessed to be able to go out with my Mom and Momma Whylene ( my boyfriends mother ). I had such a great time hanging out with two of the most precious women in my life. I am looking forward to a beautiful Christmas this year!

Now, on to some updates on the boys and Handsomes progress..... The boys have been busy visiting with cousins, and aunts and uncles and Grani Whylene :). This week will be full of Christmas baking and ornament making :) I"m looking forward to it !!

Littleman is keeping busy as usual! That boy never stops running from the time he gets up, even when he is sick! :) I found a soccer league for his age and I think this coming year Littleman will be running his little feet after a soccer ball for awhile :) Burn off some of his energy for at least a little bit! He is such a joy to have though :) I love being able to see how typical he is and I feel blessed by that, even on the days he is driving me bonkers :)!

Now onto progress for Handsome, The past few weeks have been hard health wise for Handsome. He is still struggling with coughing a lot at night. Seems like this cough is hindering a lot of progress. I have emailed Pierre to see what he suggests again.

BUT some great things have been happening as well... the anxiety has dwindled down and transitioning at school and home are getting better. Also, he is doing fantastic with playing pretend, on his own!!!! This morning he was pretending his animals were making sand angels (our version of snow angels in AZ :) LOL ) He had his dinosaur talking to Woody telling him how fun it is to make sand angels and he should do it too!! WTH!!!! I could hardly believe what I was seeing!! He also this morning was playing with batman and Robin and the Batcave and playing pretend with them!!! They were super hero rescuers saving the day!!! :) You can imagine I was beeming with pride!!! He also is making GREAT progress with his reading! This morning he looked at Robins bike and said mom R is for Robin! Last night he was able to tell me, his headache hurt, poor guy it hurt so bad he was crying and feel asleep, today he is MUCH better.

All in all, we see great progress and he is no longer taking 14 supplements a day!All he is taking is Vitamin D, Vitamin C and DHA.

Well, its time to get some more cookie dough ready so it can chill overnight! I hope you all have blessed Christmas Week!

Much Love!

Skills

2010-12-12T21:01:00.000-07:00

LOTS of great new skills are showing up out of no where :) Handsome will tell me when he is mad now, literally too :) lol... The other day I told him he could not play on the computer that he had to play a game with me and he said in a very stern voice.... Mommy I'm mad! I don't want to play the game, I wanna play the computer! And although this could be annoying to some, its an AMAZING accomplishment for Handsome to be able to express his emotions and be correct about what emotion it is that he is having :) I couldn't be prouder of him!

Get this, tonight is the second night he has spoken to me appropriatly about how he feels. He was upset about having to go to bed and was crying, and told me through his tears.... "But mom I have a question for you" " Can I watch the show tomorrow when I am done crying" :) Yes Matthias you can watch the show tomorrow :) I LOVE the new communication skills he is aquiring :)

Looking forward to a good week!

Much Love!

Progress...........December 3rd

2010-12-03T22:13:00.000-07:00

I dosed Handsome last night (sip dosed ) and once again this morning as his coughing was really bad.... and today he is much calmer and recovering from transitioning and meltdowns MUCH quicker :) .... also............shhhh don't tell him this but tonight for the first time in 4 weeks HE DIDN'T ONCE ASK while in the shower tonight "Mommy there's no fish in the shower!!!!!!! THANK YOU JESUS!!!! Lets pray it continues :) The anxiety stuff he has is just awful!

He got off the computer after me asking several times, but the good part is he only screamed once and it was done with!! NO screaming about it till we're in the shower upstairs...

***WARNING TO ALL WITH SENSITIVE STOMACHS I'M TALKING ABOUT POOP**
Also on the poop watch :) the color is starting to change to the regular brown color again :) Will know for sure tomorrow :)

Yesterday we noticed he is not picking at his eczema anymore this is a great thing as he would come home with huge scabs and pick them off and would have the blood dripping down his legs :(...

I'm thinking the dosing may be every 2 days, but also it depends on if its a stressful day or not as well again its a wait and see type of thing like anything else with autism :)

On a side note He is verbally stimming a lot singing The Wiggles song over and over again, and flipping lights switches on and off, but besides that nothing to bad :) So pretty good stuff for today :)

Also when his speech therapist came over today, he was crying about not being able to be on the computer and my mom did the trick daddy taught him " Count to 10" and he calmed down after his therapist had him count 2 times and get this........... he was quiet the whole time during therapy!!!!!!!!!!!!! He paid attention and worked :)

All in all, GREAT stuff :)

Oh ya!!! And the BIGGEST THING!!! He is NOT taking any supplements anymore except Vitamin D, C and his DHA!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is HUGE LADIES AND GENTS!!!! Handsome was on a ton of supplements and a shot of Methyl B12 before we tried homeopathy.

Lots of great progress so far and this is week 5 I believe :)

Keep praying for him!

Much love!

Lifes Trials

2010-12-02T21:37:00.004-07:00

I heard something this morning that spoke to me about the trials in this life, they said........

'Remember there is purpose in the pain you've experienced in this life' the Lord will use it to show you or someone else, about Him and his Love, Grace and Mercy for us' . Its amazing how the Lord works because just a few days ago I found a song that spoke to me about my life and the trials I have gone through as well.

I found this artist Kerrie Roberts through a site called godvine while watching a video of a spectacular home lit up for Christmas. The moment I started to listen to the song, it literally spoke to my soul..........

Now I LOVE music of all kinds and really have been connected to it since I was a very little girl, it has always brought me comfort in some way. But very few songs have spoke to me like this, I can count on one hand how many have.

I was blown away she put into words exactly what I needed to hear for this Journey I am on in life. Some days are so much harder than others and I have had my share of ups and downs and some days wonder why it seems life has fallen apart.

With this song, it has given me the comfort and reassurance I need to remember, Keep breathing you'll make it, don't give in, your not done yet, sometimes all that you can do is keep breathing, and believing don't let go, just hang on tighter a little longer, when you feel like your dying and keep breathing!

I wanted to share this song with you all in hopes it will help you as much as it has helped me :)

Enjoy and Keep Breathing :)

Kerrie TV: "Keep Breathing" Live Performance

2010-12-02T21:35:00.000-07:00

Updates from Thanksgiving day :)

2010-11-27T13:35:00.002-07:00

Handsome had a spectacular day!! He interacted with everyone :) and didn't have ONE meltdown!!

Last year he did great as well, but had several meltdowns etc.... He interacted with the dog and played catch all on his own with NO prompting from anyone!!!

He played with his cousin and little brother

And played ring around the rosie with his sister and brother :)

He played chase with the dog and was interested in the world around him :)

He was peeking through the gate and telling me what he saw and describing what they looked like to me when I asked him!

He ate dinner with everyone, and expressed to everyone how much he wants to go camping (we had a fire going outside and immediatly he was reminded of camping?).

All in all, he has made HUGE gains :) only bummer was his anxiety over fish still!!! I finally figured out if I cover them up then he is not constantly asking " The fish won't hurt me Mom?" We are praying this goes away quickly. He is also doing excessive stimming and scripting of lines again, but we were told this may happen at first with his new remedy.

All in all our Thanksgiving was full of food, love and lots of laughter :) I hope you all had a blessed day as well!

Much Love,

Our day (yesterday) In Pictures :)

2010-11-22T20:23:00.000-07:00

Thomas was getting a 'washdown' thats what Littleman calls it :)

Handsomes new shoes with his orthotics in them

Gabriels ever trusty companion Thomas!

Handsome was playing find the clue in both these pics :) I had fun with the editing on them :)

Sharing his bubbles with brother

In thought

IT'S RAINING!!!!

MORE RAIN PLEASE!

Progress this year

2010-11-20T23:43:00.000-07:00

Its MORE than amazing the progress Matthias has made in just over 1 year from starting biomedical

treatments. No one can convince us that it doesn't work.

Before we started he was having severe aggression at school and non stop tantruming and running away at school. Today Matthias talks up a storm, and rarely has aggressive issues at school. He makes great eye contact and can withstand being around alot of people much better than I ever dreamed he could.

Our next leg of the Journey through Autism is Homeopathy and we have seen GREAT progress already!

RECOVERY HERE HE COMES!!!

We can almost hear the whistle blowing and wheels coming to a stop on the autism train, I can't wait till they tell us our trip is over and we can walk off the train into the world of Recovery!

We LOVE YOU MATTHIAS!!!!

Our Ticket OFF

2010-11-17T20:21:00.000-07:00

The autism train................ I can't wait till we get to buy that ticket!!! I'm praying every day that soon that day will be here...

He is making good progress even with all the stimming going on! Lots of clear sentences and get this ............

His teacher called me today and the past 2 weeks he has gone through his reading lessons so fast, he is on book 8 and is reading books that have sentences like this " We play at the park" " Do you like to play at the park?" It made my heart leap for joy when his teacher told me that tonight!!! Of course yes I started crying, remember, they said he may never talk, let alone READ!!!!!!

So again, I will take the annoying stimming going on, keep going Matthias :O)

I can almost hear the sound of the train wheels slowing down, and the voice of the conductor telling us our trip is over, its time to get off the train.......... It will be music to my ears!!!!

Praying that day will be here soon, you deserve it so much son!

We LOVE YOU and are so proud of you!

Much love,

Week 2 of the remedy

2010-11-16T21:48:00.000-07:00

Whew........... the first two weeks have been hard........

Right away Handsome got a cold so we have been fighting through that first... today I think it is finally gone! :)

We have been seeing A LOT of verbal stimming going on, enough to drive me nuts honestly....... this is the kind of thing I haven't seen in a LONG time, BUT I was prepared for this :)

Along with the stimming though I am seeing great things as well.... lots of clarity in conversations he has never had before...

Example : tonight it was time to go to bed and he started to cry about having to go to bed right away, I laid him down and covered him up, and did our normal nightly ritual, kisses on the forehead, and in the middle of our usual "Night Matthias, Angels" and he says " Big ONES" he says, " Mommy, I'm okay now" WTH!!! He has never told me that after being upset about something :) This is great!

Another example : yesterday we went to get his shoes and orthotics and after leaving the room he says clearly" Mommy, I don't want these black shoes on, I want the white and blue ones on" lol they hurt because he was not use to wearing the orthotics, then in the car when we are driving away he says " Mom, I love you... and I like my new shoes" HOLY WHAT THE HECK! Remember now, he never talks this way!

So that being said, I will take the aggravating verbal stims etc, I love being able to see my son progress!!!

Homeopathy ROCKS!!!! And I thank the Lord for our Practitioner Pierre Fontaine on a daily basis!!

Much Love,

Slow Slow progress.......

2010-11-12T10:02:00.000-07:00

Handsome is making very slow progress, we still have lots of new and old stimming going on constantly all day long, but I am remembering that this is common for the first few weeks... I'm just praying that the first few weeks goes by quickly :)... Please continue to pray for Handsome and his progress :)

Much Love,

A Day to remember..........

2010-11-08T23:12:00.000-07:00

Even though it was 8 years ago, those memories are so fresh in my memory, I remember examining every inch of him so I could always remember what my precious little boy looked like, talking about how much he looked like his big brother Khallee, I remember everyone coming in to see him one by one. Each one of them held him and loved him, and then we baptised him, shortly after I remember being in alot of pain, but not wanting to rest, I only wanted to hold him as long as I could while he was here... I cried....... oh I cried...... the tears fell frequently from that day on.

We were blessed to have a beautiful funeral service for him graveside, and I remember that day too, its so physically heart wrenching, to walk away from the grave of your child, leaving them there. The only comfort I had was knowing that one day we would see each other again.

As a Mother I wish I knew what he looked like, I want to know what his laughter sounds like, how he talks and walks, if he was going to be good at playing sports, or a great singer... I long to know those things....For now I know the Lord is doing a great job of loving him, I just miss him so much, even 8 years later.

To my first born son ............. Keane, I love you with all my heart and soul, Happy Birthday Sweetie!! I hope you know how much your life is cherished. You touched so many lives, and have left footprints on my heart.I wish I could hug you and kiss you on your 8th birthday today, but until the day I can, please remember how you are loved today and always. I love you!

Happy birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy birthday Dear Keane...... May Jesus Bless you!!!

Mommy

Much love to you all!

Day 5...........

2010-11-08T19:21:00.000-07:00

Very rough morning, but I do believe this cough/cold is getting in the way of progress... we just started sip dosing tonight for the cough/cold and honestly since we started doing that he seems much more calm and focused :) ?!?! We'll see, either way I am just glad its helping his cough he was pretty miserable from the coughing. BTW Sip dosing is when you dilute the remedy in 8oz of water and have them take....... sips ever 15 minutes :) Not to much more to talk about with his progress today. Pray for the cold to go away so we can see more progress :)

Much Love!

Hooo weeeeeeeeeeee

2010-11-07T16:05:00.000-07:00

Today started off ROUGH for Handsome.... LOTS of verbal stimming all day long, and screaming for no reason, and he has a cough :( but what I have been told is it is pretty common for these things to occur.....BUT on the good side :) he also has been forming clear sentences he has never said before and noticing things he has NEVER NOTICED BEFORE :)

We painted the downstairs bathroom this weekend, and he comes into the bathroom when its all finished and says, "Wow Mommy, The bathroom looks wonderful, I like it! " What the HECK!!! He has NEVER noticed things like paint on a wall or new decorations in the bathroom :) Another point for homeopathy :)

Can't believe the weekend is almost over, what the heck happened to it??? I have a TON of homework to finish before midnight tonight, so I need to get my little butt going.

Hope you all had a great weekend!

Much Love!

Day 2 of the remedy :)

2010-11-05T10:59:00.000-06:00

Well we had another great morning after his remedy :) He slept ALL NIGHT LONG!!! And was very calm and cooperative this morning. He even recovered quickly from something that would normally send him into a meltdown :) YIPPEE!!! He listened right away when I spoke to him, made GREAT eye contact and didn't fuss when I told him he had to get up to go on the bus!! All great things!!!

Thinking from what happened last week, we will probably dose him again tomorrow morning unless he seems like he needs it tonight. He is going on a fieldtrip to the State Fair :) They have a dinosaur exhibit that he is going to LOVE :) Here's hoping for a great report from the teacher today!

Please continue to pray for great progress for him!

Much Love!

HOLY .....

2010-10-29T20:21:00.000-06:00

HOMEOPATHY!!!!!

Pierre You ROCK!!!!!

I really wasn't expecting to see anything over night, but seriously...had the calmest morning in a very, very long time with Handsome... He also seemed much more focused this morning... No crying about leaving the house to get on the bus.... no asking the same question over and over again before leaving the house... His Grannie asked him to go and get his thermos and he turned right away to go upstairs and get it!!! We didn't have to repeat ourselves or make him repeat the instruction we just gave to him.... His teacher said he had a great day, no meltdowns at all and NO pushing :)

Tonight, again, very calm........ normally if we ask him to do something he would scream and we would have to ask again and then he would do it, but tonight for example... I told him " Its time to go and take a shower, log off of the computer" He didn't even protest, logged off and walked right upstairs!!! WTH??? Also, he SAT STILL all through dinner! Really after the first day????

Also tonight, he was desperately searching for one of his safari animals and couldn't find it, and said " Mom, I can't find him anywhere?" Normally, he would have been crying and really frustrated about not finding it, but right now he is sitting calmly and watching Sponge Bob..

Honestly I was NOT expecting any kind of change after the first day of giving him his remedy... but, I know I"m not imagining it :)... So from now on I will be writing down all the progress or digressions we see, that way we can really see what is going on :).

Thanks everyone for praying :) Please continue to pray for him, I'm going into this with an open mind and we're ready for some serious progress no matter what :)

Much Love,

Its Official!

2010-10-28T20:09:00.005-06:00

We received Handsomes remedy from Pierre in the mail today :) We are suppose to give him his first dose tonight before bed and then NO MORE until we speak to him again in 7-10 days :)!!!! I am so excited and nervous all at the same time!!! Will you please pray for Handsome during this time, I would really appreciate it! We will keep you informed on whats going on with his progress :).

Tonight its also official :) we are watch 'The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown' its officially the beginning of my favorite time of year!!! The holidays are the best time, even when life has its ups and downs... I still love the holidays :) I hope you all are enjoying this season and watching a dearly loved childhood cartoon tonight too :)

Much Love!!

Day 1........

2010-10-26T09:25:00.006-06:00

Waiting........ Our appointment with Pierre went very well yesterday, I have to say its very intense and much different than any other appointment I have been to for my son before. But, I know this is going to help Handsome a lot! So today is day one of waiting for the remedy he prescribed to come in the mail :)...

Thank you all for praying for us! And I will keep you updated on the progress!! So until we receive the remedy........... We're just lying around and waiting :) lol
Much love
Lisa

October 25th will this be.....

2010-10-25T00:04:00.004-06:00

Another important day in our lives on this Journey of Hope? I believe so, and I'm certainly praying it will be. Tomorrow is the big day for our appointment with Pierre Fontaine Practitioner of Homeopathy and I can hardly wait! I remember first talking about this in July and now the day is finally here. I'm going in this cautiously optomistic as to not get my hopes up to high. But I have prayed about this route in our Journey for awhile now and know its the right way to go. Will you also pray that this appointment goes well and that we see great success for Handsome! I will keep you all informed on how it goes, we feel extremely blessed to be given the opportunity to see Pierre and know we will see great progress with him!

Here are a few pictures of the boys from this week! I hope you all had a great weekend!

Much Love,

Four years ago......

2010-10-13T13:27:00.002-06:00

Today, our lives changed forever......... Handsome was diagnosed with autism at just 2 1/2 years old.

I clearly remember all the work it took to even get him the diagnosis of what was wrong with him, all along hoping and praying it wasn't the big 'A'. I had heard of autism, but didn't know anyone with a child who had it. We ruled out hearing loss, and a few other developmental disorders that it possibly could be and then started with AZ Early Intervention, they came in evaluated him, talked to me and then told us we needed to go and see a Psychologist to get him evaluated. The big day was Friday, October 13, 2006.

Handsomes Dad and I loaded him up in the car and drove to the Psychologists office. We waited in the waiting room for what seemed like hours. It was the same routine I had been through SO many times already, 'Fill out this paper work, stating all his history from birth to current, along with all of my history, his dads history, and all the information about my pregnancies and so on and so forth. After filling out the 15 page booklet :) we went back.

She was a very nice lady and while we were in their she asked us lots of questions while she watched our son play. She pointed out things to me, that I never noticed before, like... " You see how he plays with those blocks, he doesn't play with them the way a child should, he picks them up looks at them and then throws them"

After many questions and lots of pointing out of what our son is doing. She sat back and asked me, "How long have you thought something may be wrong?" and I told her " Since he was about 15 months old"

And then she said it, " Unfortunately, I see a lot of this lately...." pause " Have you ever heard of autism?"

My heart sank " Yes.." and then she said it " Your son has autism.... I would put him in the category of Severe to Moderate, seeing as he is so young he may be able to make some progress" " Unfortunately , there is no cure, with time and therapy he might be able to make some progress and talk, but I can't say for sure what kind of progress he will make. I can tell you that the more intervention you get for him the better it may get." You should learn to accept that he may only progress this far and that's it and just accept him as he is......

Through the fog of crying I heard what she was saying, but was so overcome with fear, grief and disappointment for my son. We sat and listened to her, and took all the paperwork she had for us and she walked us down the hall. I politely excused myself to the restroom, where I completely fell in to tears. All I could think of was " How can this be?" Why my son? Haven't we struggled enough already? Why does Handsome have to struggle? What will we do?

I tried desperatley to hold it together for my son, I didn't want to upset him. I was so glad Glenn was there cause Handsome really needed his daddy right then.... AS I was about to walk through the door, I heard the Doctor tell his dad, this is going to be a rough road, some children progress a little further, but most don't.... you will walk through a lot of feelings, and its okay that she is upset, let her work through it, I"m sorry this has happened, and she left.

I dried my eyes and walked out and held it together, We really didn't say much on the ride home as we both were in shock of it all. Glenn tried his best to reassure me it would be okay, I was just filled with so much grief I could barely speak.....He told me if I needed him he would stay, but I knew he needed to go to work. I felt so bad because I knew he was going through the same feelings I was, but I just couldn't think or speak, I was numb...

I dropped him off, drove down the street parked the car in a grocery store parking lot and called my sister. I remember when she answered the phone I could barely speak, she heard me crying and said " Are you okay? What did they say? Do you need me to come and get you?"

I finally was able to form the words. " Handsome has autism" She told me to come to her store and she would meet me outside, she did and she comforted me and told me it would be okay. I remember finally getting home that night, and putting him to bed and watching him and thinking, whats going to happen to him? How will this ever be ok? I cried for what seems like weeks, but really only allowed myself a few days, and then I dug my feet in and read everything I could!

This past year, he has made HUGE progress only because we decided to do biomedical treatments. No one can convince me that it doesn't work, because it does... and Handsome is a living testimony to how well it works. He is not recovered yet, but that is the goal.... In just two short weeks, we will see Pierre Fontaine to start Homeopathy! We are so excited for the opportunity to do this for Handsome. I know its just one more step for him on the road to recovery.

Yesterday WAS...............

2010-10-05T10:53:00.000-06:00

Handsomes very first day in a 'Typical' classroom :) and he did very well! Last year I put in his IEP that I wanted him to go into a typical kindergarten class for a few hours a day. Yesterday they started that process :) He went in for story time and play time with an aide. The teacher said the only problems he had was staying quiet during story time, but, again that is why he is in the typical class, to learn what is appropriate. I am super excited for him and can't wait till he can spend more and more time in the class.

Today has been a great day here in AZ, its 74 degree's outside and that means that summer is finally starting to make its exit!!!! This is something we long for here in Metro Phoenix area... I know, I know... Fall officially started a few weeks ago, but someone always forgets to remind the Lord that it needs to happen in Arizona at the same time :) lol...

I hope you all have a fabulous Tuesday!

Much Love,

Red Food Dye..........

2010-09-29T13:22:00.000-06:00

is EVIL!!!!!

Handsome got into a tube of gel food dye the other day... and ever since then he has had MAJOR behavioral problems :(... He couldn't concentrate at school, was pushing and shoving kids again and screaming for no reason..... Transitioning has been a nightmare too... so I am praying this will get better.

The Big day to see Pierre Fontaine is coming up! October 25th is the day we have the appt. I am hopeful that this will help Handsome alot. Will you please be praying for him :)

By the way!!! Did you all know that today is National Coffee Day!!!

OMG!!! I didn't realize this till this morning, I am such a Starbucks addict! I had to quickly apologize to Starbucks for not acknowledging such an important day :)!

Now on to a different subject... as you may have noticed... I finally was able to get my dream camera :)

I am so excited! I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!!!!!! :) I love taking pictures with it and learning as much as I can. My friend Becky has asked me to take the pictures for her wedding in February, I am honored and excited to be able to have this opportunity! It will be interesting as I am also one of the bridesmaids, but hey, I am always up for double duty :)

Fall has yet to officially arrive her in Arizona, but we are eagerly awaiting its arrival.

We are all tired of the heat and can not wait to be able to get out doors more often. After all, when we are out doors, that means Mommy can take lots more pictures with great backgrounds :)!

I hope you all are doing well! Please leave me a comment and let me know whats been going on in your lives!

Much Love,

MIA

2010-09-25T22:49:00.000-06:00

Sorry I have been missing in action.............school started for me in August and I have been busy busy busy :)... Thought I would post a quick update with pictures :)

September is here....

2010-08-31T20:48:00.000-06:00

Well I can hardly believe the "summer" is officially over..... not really here in AZ... its still warm, but I'm so glad its September... September means I am one step closer to getting to schedule an appointment with Pierre Fontaine for Handsome :) I can hardly wait!!!! I know I will have to wait a few months to even get him an appointment to be seen, but that is fine as well :)

I have meet so many wonderful parents of children who have done or are doing classical homeopathy and their childrens progress or even recovery is amazing!

Since the day of Handsomes diagnosis I have prayed for recovery for him and I know one day it will happen..... the hardest part of this whole autism journey is seeing your child suffer because they don't feel good and your already doing everything you can to try and make them feel better. I'm so grateful for the HUGE amount of progress he has already made and I"m praying that homeopathy will just be the last step he needs.

If you have a chance, stop by this blog to see some of the amazing recovery going on :)
http://recoveringnicholas.com/
I hope you all are doing good!

Much Love,

THE AUTISM SONG: DON'T GIVE UP ON ME

2010-08-31T20:33:00.001-06:00

My Desire.............

2010-08-26T13:59:00.001-06:00

Well its that time of year again, school season is back in gear here in AZ :) So glad that Handsome is loving being back at school and doing so well too :) Mommy has also returned back for my 3rd semester of college :) I am still set on my path for social work so I can work with families of children with autism, but I have also set another goal for myself. One that is precious to my heart and I LOVE doing it!

I have been very fond of photography for many years, but the last 3 years I have really been into it. Last year I found a lady who does photography for families of special needs children, and I had a bit of an AH HA moment! I know how hard it is, to get your child to sit still for a photo, let alone a child with special needs. I have taken thousands of pics of Handsome and they are always of him looking down or sideways, but eventually after MUCH percistence I get one of him looking at the camera :)

I would LOVE to have my own photography business and take these kinds of pictures along with scenery and just your typical pics as well. So this is my new goal :) and next semester I am going to start taking some photography classes :) And soon I will be able to purchase my dream camera :)

So this is my dream and goal :) what is yours :)

Much Love!

Can You Guess What Today Was???

2010-08-09T09:54:00.000-06:00

Handsome was so excited to go back to school today :) Love how happy it makes him :) I know some of you might be shocked, but here in AZ we go back to school in the middle of August :). When will you all be getting your kiddos off to school?

Much Love,

Summer is ...........

2010-08-05T14:45:00.000-06:00

Over....... well at least it is when it comes to not having to go to school, its still as hot as ever here in AZ and will be until end of October as usual.

Yesterday I got my call from the bus driver Handsome will have for this school year, and I was blessed to find out its the same one from last year so this should be transitioning a little smoother :) Today I spoke to the school and found out he will also have the same teacher as he had last year, even BIGGER blessing!!! His teacher last year was fabulous and went above and beyond what was expected of her.

I can't wait for him to start his regular school routines and get back into the swing of life. Its always so much better for him when he is in school with as little down time as possible. Handsome always seems to do better, when he has more to do :).

Tomorrow, we also start speech therapy again and I am so glad! This is going to help him so much, we took a break for awhile because he was not getting any further. The new place seems to be a good fit for him, so please pray it works well for him :).

Mommy also starts school in just 2 weeks, so please pray for me too :) I hope you all are doing well. Please leave me a comment and let me know how you are doing too.

Much Love,

Anxiouslly ....

2010-07-29T13:14:00.000-06:00

waiting for Pierre Fontaine to return from vacation :) I have had some nay sayers about my new approach to my Handsomes treatments, but I just know this is what we are suppose to be doing for him. I meet and seen so many great stories of progress with children who are doing classic homeopathy and I can't wait to be able to get Handsome started :)

We have alot of things coming up that will change Handsome's routines, so please be in prayer for him to transition easily with it all. Extended school year ends today and then he will have a little over a week off until school begins for the new year. Please pray that he will be able to get the same teacher that he had last year, she was fabulous and he did so well with her! Also Mommy starts school in a few weeks so please pray for me as well :)

Much Love

Treading our feet....

2010-07-21T23:46:00.002-06:00

Into NEW territory...... I have been doing some research the last several months and have decided that we are going to give Classical Homeopathy a try for Handsome... please don't get me wrong... Handsomes current DAN! has done wonders for him!!! But I have done some serious prayer on this and really believe this is the next step we should take on Our Journey of Hope.

I have 'meet' several friends on Facebook who are taking their children to see Pierre Fontaine and that is who we are going to take him to see. Well.. you don't really take him since he is in New York but he does his appointments through Skype. I am very excited about scheduling the appointment soon as he is on vacation for the next few weeks. I will keep you all posted on what is happening and when our first appointment is!

Until then will you keep us in your prayers as we have LOTS of new changes coming as school starts again and there is never a guarantee that Handsome will get the same teacher, and he will be starting speech therapy again :) so excited cause we found one close to our house! And also please pray that we will be able to afford this appointment, not sure how but I know it will happen :)

I hope you all are doing well, and if any of you have experience with homeopathy please let me know what you think about your experience :)

Much Love,

PROGRESS.. .PROGRESS... PROGRESS... :)

2010-07-04T00:05:00.001-06:00

Hi Everyone!

My post Tonight is simply to layout everything we have done with Handsome and the progress we have seen from it :) I hope this helps a little bit and gives others some ideas and HOPE :) Handsome has made so much progress on biomedical treatments :) and I'm so grateful to our wonderful DAN doctor!

Here is a video to show you Handsome at 2 yrs old before he was diagnosed :

And a video of Handsome last month 6yrs old reading to me :

I will start at the very very beginning, right after his diagnosis with autism at 2 1/2 yrs old. Our first visit was with a doctor at The Melmed center and this is what we started with
- 1 tsp of Super Nu Thera daily
- 1/2 tsp of Cod Liver Oil
- Casein Free diet
- speech therapy
- Occupational Therapy
- Physical therapy
- Music therapy

We saw alot of improvement when we started first with removing casein, more eye contact, was more compliant with doing hand over hand signing words like, more, drink, milk, please, thank you. Once we added the supplements we continued to see improvement with eye contact and he started signing on his own. By the end of 2007 Handsome started speaking, he said his first word BA - for bubble a few months before he turned 4. During all this time he had each of those therapy once a week, except for Music, we were not able to get music therapy paid for until 2008.

During 2007 I did alot of research on biomedical treatments and ABA, floor time and also researched into parents and docs who did not use biomedical interventions. After comparing both I thankfully :) chose to do biomedical interventions:). We continued on the pace we were on and Handsome started Preschool at in 2007 as well.

In 2008 we started him on the Gluten Free diet as well as continuing the casein free diet. During this time, we were able to start in home ABA on our own, we can not afford to do ABA therapy intensively the way he really needed it, but I took training in it and use it in home on behavioral issues ect. The sad part about this is that I know in my heart of hearts that if I could have afforded to do ABA therapy 40 hours a week he would not have alot of the behavior issues as he does now :( but I'm thankful for how far he has come :). We saw some progress after taking out gluten from his diet with his bowels and he didn't have as much gas, but this year he digressed really badly, we saw NO progress for over a year. In June of 2009 I made the biggest decision to take him to a DAN doctor and it changed our course of progress :)

2009 was the BIGGEST year of progress :) We were able to get Handsome in to see a DAN doctor Dr.Schneider has been the biggest improvement to Handsomes life! I am so grateful to God for her and her wonderful staff at CARE.

I will list everything we have done with Dr.Schneider, it may not be in particular orders, but I will let you know what progress we saw with each :)

- MB12 Shots- Lots of eye contact, lots more speech, sleeping through the night!
- Diflucan- HUGE speech progress,he went from 2-3 word sentences to 5-6 word sentences! and his belly use to be so bloated but not anymore (unless yeast is rearing its ugly head again :( ) No more constant gas as well!
- vitamin D 5000 iui - His skin tone went from being severely pale to a suntan look
- Methyl Folate - More eye contact
- Magnesium Taurate - helps with trying to keep him regular and NOT constipated
- AKA - He has very high levels of ammonia :( and this has helped alot with keeping him focused more
- TMG - I've noticed this helps alot with his verbal stimming, he still does it, but NOT as much as he use too, it also helps with his hand stimming
- Zinc - I haven't really noticed a difference with it, but its a much needed supplement for him
- Vitamin C- a MUST to help keep him regular so he isn't constipated, Constipation is a HUGE problem for him :(
- Glutathion Lotion- right away we noticed he sat still more and didn't lean on his tummy over and over again
- Selenium- didn't notice anything, but again a much needed supplement for his health
- IV Chelation and IV Glutathion- HUGE improvements with wanting to eat new foods!! MORE speech, more eye contact even BIGGER improvement in no leaning on tummy and HUGE improvements with sitting still at dinner table, listening more when being talked too, following directions more able to follow 2 step instructions, starts memorizing songs (not children songs, songs like I'll be there by the Jackson 5), memorizing books, when asked safety questions like what is your name, your moms name, your dads name he can give them to you. Is able to identify 16 words and read them in a sentence :).

Now this is just the progress I can think of off the top of my head with out delving into my papers. Handsome has made so much progress being on biomedical treatments. I am so glad that I chose to take this road for him. I am so grateful that he has come so far, and I realize he is much further along than many of my wonderful Warrior parent friends, he still has so much further to go. We struggle daily with sensory overload, chronic constipation, major behavior issues, and lots of receptive language problems, BUT I know that the further we go on in our biomedical treatments, the more progress he will make and I am so grateful to the Lord for our DAN doctor and the wonderful community of autism parents I have meet and become friends with.

My hope is that one day ALL of our children will be whole again. God gave us a perfect child... MAN gave us autism!

Much Love!

Autism.....

2010-06-22T21:09:00.000-06:00

Since 2006 my life has revolved around that word.... autism.... as much as I dislike autism... it has become a part of my daily life. In the past 4 years I have learned how to cope with the ups and downs of autism and the joys and trials that it brings. Along the way, I continue to educate myself on everything I can by reading and staying involved in the autism community. Sadly, there are MANY of us, but I am so grateful for all of the wonderful, beautiful people I have met in our community.

This weekend, I have a wonderful opportunity to go to a one day Autism Conference here in Phoenix,http://events.constantcontact.com/register/event?oeidk=a07e2xakuhwcdf8dc5e put on by The Autism Society of America and ACT Today, the guest speaker will be Dr. Andrew Wakefield. I am still reading his book Callous Disregard and have to say I am not shocked by the cover up and dishonesty that took place in slandering this honored man and doctor. I can say I am looking forward to being able to sit in a room full of wonderful parents, families and friends who are all on the same journey as I am. And I can't wait to hear Dr.Wakefield speak and watch his movie called "Hear the Silence", and watch two more great documentaries as well.

If you are here in Phoenix or don't live far from here, please consider registering and coming to this important day! I can't wait to tell you all about it!

Much Love,

Today is brought to you by the letter - P

2010-06-14T20:57:00.000-06:00

We been doing alot of this lately :) SUMMER IS HERE and that means its time for

POOLTIME

PLAYTIME

POPSICLES

When your a kid you just gotta love summertime! The boys are certainly enjoying it!

I hope you all are enjoying your time with your families this summer :) Remember to take some time to make some memories :)

Happy Summertime!

Where to begin?

2010-06-01T21:16:00.000-06:00

A lot has gone on in this past week in the world of autism and biomedical community. I and many other parents like me, find ourselves at odds with many people over Dr. Andrew Wakefield. The recent broadcast with Matt Lauer is really what upset me and many other parents. We often find our side of the story (our doctors, research and information) not being told. We even find the reporters/journalists lying about information about our doctors.

After watching Dr.Wakefield stand up for parents like me and our children it makes me be proud to know there are doctors out there that are willing to risk it all! Including their reputation and license.....

I try to explain to others why I believe what I believe and here is what I have thought of carefully to respond to that question with more appropriate answer than because my son is proof that biomedical works.

If you would have asked me 10 years ago if I would be the kind of parent to question authority, or our government agencies I would have told resoundingly NO. I was not brought up to buck the system, we were taught to always believe the best in others, including our government, and I did, until my son was diagnosed with autism. Something shifted in my soul so dramatically that day. I mourned the loss of the future I had hoped for my son, I mourned for my sons health and abilities in life. I mourned for my child's life.

I remember clearly that day when the doctor told us, Your son has autism... and I felt faint... She kindly told us, if we got him intense therapy he may improve, and he might speak one day, she rattled on and on about the diagnosis and that there is no cure and they don't know why it happens..... and I just kept thinking.... NO NOT ANOTHER CHILD..... PLEASE LORD...... Don't take him away from me too...... I was heartbroken and could do nothing but cry.

About a week later, after I allowed myself some time to feel the real pain that is involved with this diagnosis I began to press on full force for Handsome. I read everything I could get my hands on whether that was articles in magazines, books, emails, posts, websites... I read it all! In my late night readings I found two websites and one book that would change the course for Our Journey..... Generation Rescue, TACA and Evidence of Harm. I dug in deep and read everything they had for new parents on the websites and researched it all. I spoke to other parents who were doing biomedical interventions and parents that were not, and spoke to Doctors who were DAN docs and regular pediatricians who were not, and after all my research I weighed out the options and decided to go the biomedical road for our son. Glenn agreed and I started the process one thing at a time. First the diets, and then supplement by supplement and eventually to where we are today, and the reason I chose this road.... there is HOPE on this road and the other road is dark and HOPELESS. I knew we could do these treatments with Doctors who were greatly respected and loved and I am so glad we did. Handsome, is NOT the same child you would have seen on 10-13-2006 when we heard the word autism. He has changed dramatically, don't get me wrong, he still has problems and many hurdles to overcome, but I am so grateful for the recovery that IS happening.

I know that may be a LONG answer as to WHY I believe what I do, but I hope it helps to understand that there is emotion involved in this process. I have found so many people lately, blirting out things like, "I make my decisions from science and evidence of proof, there is NO emotion to it." and frankly, thats just a crock of crap. There is always emotion involved when you are dealing with your children. I truly believe that is why we chose to take our children to DAN doctors because they are involved emotionally, our children are NOT just another patient...They have invested their lives to these children's health and I am forever grateful for Doctors like our DAN doctor Dr. Cindy Schneider and for Dr. Andrew Wakefield for he has sacrificed so much for our children, and I will back him to the end. He has fought for our children and I will fight for him as well.
So now, I am the kind of parent that does buck the system and questions what our government is doing for/to our children and I am proud of it!

So the next time you see me ranting about biased media coverage or people who are degrading Dr. Wakefield, or you notice my status constantly saying " The only Callous Disregard our children have ever received is from our own government", remember the road that has lead me here and try and understand why.

Much Love,

And THEY said we'd be lucky if he would speak......

2010-05-19T20:53:00.000-06:00

♥ FABULOUS ♥ FABULOUS PROGRESS WITH HANDSOME!!

He has learned to recognize 16 words this semester at school and Today He read two sentences I wrote for him to read :)!!!

I never thought we would ever see this day! We were told that maybe, if we were lucky, with intense therapy he would be able to speak one day, and now my baby is READING!!!!!!

Take a look for yourself :) Below...

I'm so proud of you Matthias!!! Thank you to everyone who has every helped my son, including all the wonderful lenders at Lend4health! Look at see for yourself what biomedical treatments do for our children!

Boyz II Men - A Song For Mama

2010-05-08T22:56:00.000-06:00

Mothers Day

2010-05-08T16:57:00.003-06:00

I can hardly believe I have been a Momma for 8 years this year! I am so greatful for the blessing of being a Mom. Each one of my boys is special in their own ways, and even though one of them is not physically here with me to love on this Mothers Day I think of him just as much as I think of my boys here with me. They have each blessed my life in their own ways, sometimes its more challenging than I would like it to be, but all the time its a gift. Today and tomorrow I am going to enjoy my time with my boys even more than I normally would :) and remember the gift of being a Mother!

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL MY FRIENDS!

XO XO XO XO XO XO

MUCH LOVE,

TA DA!!!!

2010-05-07T01:18:00.002-06:00

Hi Everyone!

I just had to post quickly to let you all come and see my new makeover of my blog :) Isn't it fabulous!!!!! MastaMama did a beautiful job! If your interested in getting a makeover for your blog, stop by her page and check out what she has to offer.

LOVE LOVE LOVE my new look :)

Now time for bed!

Much Love

IEP is coming

2010-04-23T23:33:00.001-06:00

First I have to say Handsome had a FABO week at school!!! YAY Handsome!!!!!

He had a spectacular week and his teacher was so excited for him as well as us :) Lately he has been having lots of trouble transitioning from one task to another at school and we finally found a new system to help him transition better :) This is huge friends... and I'm praying it keeps getting better.

Now on to next week......... :)

I have his IEP next week and I will be requesting that they let him attend the 'typical' kindergarten for a few hours a day with an aid... Matthias is doing great in his reading skills and language but the only downside to that type of class he is in is he picks up on many stimming habits of the other kiddos, which I fully expected to happen, but I feel if he is able to go to a typical room for a few hours a day ( know he will be able to addapt to the typical kids fairly easily... the only concern is his behaviors at times, hence the reason I would like an aid... please pray for this whole process as I know they will NOT agree because he at times can shove other people just out of the blue... so I am praying I do NOT have a fight on my hands when it comes to the school it self... his teacher agrees but he would definitely need an aid.

If any of my friends have an suggestions for me, please leave me a message or comment.... I need all the pointers I can get :)

Much Love,

The REAL story!

2010-04-13T11:50:00.001-06:00

As many of you know, Dr. Wakefield has been smacked in the face over the last year in the UK media as well as our biased media here in the US. A few days ago, he finally was able to sit down and set the WHOLE record straight on what actually happened in his case. This is the whole story unlike what you may have seen with Matt Lauer...... I am going to attach all the links for his interview with Dr. Mercola on April 8th. He talks about what really happened in his case studies and also speaks about vaccinations.

Please, if you have ever had any question about what this honorable man has done... take a moment and listen to the truth about his story! He has NEVER been apposed to vaccinations.... he has taken a hit for our children with autism.... He is a honorable and loved Doctor in the Autism community. I hope you will take some time and listen to all the links...There are 10 in order from top to bottom.... I know there are alot, but stop and listen and maybe if you don't understand why I have done what I have with both my sons, maybe you will now :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIsFW5phHas
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1fyO9D63ts
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evAgmDQchyw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nbSt1gp9xC8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNqnkuCDAZA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89WHXd0KiP8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrCumNynLJw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENY_M1XEW4s
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJSbZMdcuPU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u7zNmtBxyuU

Much Love,

Today is Day 11.....

2010-04-11T13:19:00.001-06:00

First off I have to say, this is not a nice little blog post today, I am going to rant and rave for a bit :)

Of Autism (awareness) month, but I like to refer to it as, Autism Action month.... I and many others are VERY aware of autism, to some it has stolen their child who they try to recover every day and hope and pray they will hear them speak one word, to others it tried to steal their child but they were able to bring them back from the brinks of autism and to most.... it is a daily struggle, trying to find the balance of living with autism in our midst on a minute to minute basis.

Its heartbreaking as a parent to watch the news this month and only hear about Autism ONCE in the media.... The only day I even heard about it was on World Autism Day on April 2nd.... I'm sorry did I miss something? Isn't this whole month suppose to be about Autism and how Aware we need to be??? All I seem to hear and see is how quickly the media can point the finger at some doctors in the lime light and of course THAT receives airtime in the media!

At what point will mainstream medicine wake up and deliver the real news!!!!!!! What we as parents already know,......genetics loads the gun, vaccines/environment pulls the trigger. That is what happened to our children, but NO ONE in our government wants to admit nor take the time to do the proper research. We are once again, lied to and told.... we are going to do the research that is necessary... YA RIGHT!!! No your not, your going to do the research that saves your butt from having to answer why on earth you would go against BIG PHARMA!!!!!!

The media was quick to mention Dr.Wakefields article being pulled, but why don't we hear anything about the last month were the man at the head of the vaccines don't cause autism controvercy escaped with 2 mill. dollars of government money???? Where is that media coverage???? Heres a link I borrowed from one of my friends on Facebook with the story.....

http://www.politicolnews.com/cdc-vaccine-fraud-2-million/

Thats not all either, why wasn't THIS story bigger than it is either!!!! A former vaccine researcher came forward with the truth that he himself was paid to LIE and fake studies!!!! WTH!!!!! Heres the link for that one..... http://www.naturalnews.com/028194_Scott_Reuben_research_fraud.html

Why in the heck are these not being talked about!!!! Autism is bigger than childhood aids and cancer(and please don't misunderstand, I'm not saying those aren't important either) and NO ONE wants to talk about the truth!!! They want to sweep it under the carpet and hope that it goes away....

Well I have news for our government and the media that loves to cover up everything!!! WE WILL NOT GO AWAY........... We will keep speaking out against you and everything you are doing AGAINST OUR CHILDREN!!!

I just read an article yesterday about how an adult man with autism who also suffers from seizures, was refused treatment at all the local hospitals because they will not treat patients with autism.... NO I'm not kidding!!! Heres the link.... http://www.kfor.com/news/local/kfor-news-autistic-denied-medical-story,0,6674840.story

It makes me sick to think that not only do we have to worry about what our kids will or will not be able to do when they are adults, but NOW we have to worry about them being refused care simply because they have autism, and then they arrest him for kicking a guard and put him in JAIL with a bond of $8000!!!! What in the heck has this world come too?????? How is this ok??? Its clear discrimination and I can't believe they could hold someone in jail that is not mentally capable of understanding what they ahve done....

So far for day 11 of Autism Action month, I have not read any nor seen any media coverage of autism, not even about this young man I wrote about above. I had to read about that from a group I belong too....

I'm saddend by the lack of coverage and 'awareness' that is displayed on our TVs...

I hope no one ever has to go through life living with autism, cause frankly... it sucks to watch your child struggle every day.... But I hope someway some how the people in the media and our government are affected so that they can see just how important this is.

Much Love,

Christ the Lord....

2010-04-04T01:45:00.002-06:00

IS RISEN!!!! HE IS RISEN INDEED!!!!!!!!

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE!!!

HAVE A BLESSED RISEN SUNDAY!

April is autism awareness

2010-03-31T18:48:00.003-06:00

As most of you know, tomorrow starts autism awareness month. I am all about autism awareness, constantly trying to get the word otu about autism and how prevalent it is....

But I am also about getting the message out that autism IS treatable and we should find a cure for it.

So I created this for the month of April for autism awareness....

What do you think?

Much love,

Is it bedtime yet???

2010-03-30T21:34:00.004-06:00

I was asking myself that question at 5:45 this morning........ Handsome has been up frequently because his tummy hurts again. That darn yeast............. so sick and tired of it upsetting my sons life and making it difficult for him to sleep :(.... Makes for a long night for him and I and a very long day for us both!

On a side note, don't you LOVE this new pic I got from a friend of my on facebook? It truelly speaks loudly about what happened to my handsome!

Now back to what I was sayin :)

I'm praying tonight he will sleep well, I gave him some benadryl cause his allergies are acting up too..... Here's hoping for a good nights sleep for us both!

Oh by the way, this is only a temporary look for my blog, me fabulous new blog layout will be up in a few weeks :) can't wait to share that one with you all!

Much Love,

If you've met one child with autism............

2010-03-24T21:43:00.004-06:00

You've met ONE child with autism................. I heard that saying not long after my son was diagnosed with autism in 2006, and oh how true it is. No child with autism has the same signs, symptoms, and illness' than every other child with autism. That's what makes autism so hard sometimes......

You see, being a mom of child with autism I OFTEN come across others, whether it is here on my blog or on Facebook, who like to compare themselves to my child. Each time I have come across them they are always someone who is either an uneducated idiot, or someone who themselves is diagnosed with a higher functioning form of autism and can live on their own and function in this world. While I think it is great that they are able to live life and function in this world even though they still struggle, socially, they are by NO MEANS comparable to my child or countless others that I know.

Its honestly, annoying to hear them rant on and on about how they do not want to be cured, that there is nothing wrong with people with autism and please stop trying to find a cure. I've even heard some of them tell us parents that if we pay a little more attention to our kids, rather than trying to find a cure for them, maybe we would notice that there isn't anything wrong with them at all and all they need is a little more attention from us.

Oh yes, the refrigerator mother comment! So my child has autism, because apparently I don't pay attention to him.......

Yes lets see...........that's right, I never paid attention to the chronic ear infections that we didn't know he had until it was to late because he couldn't tell us he was in pain we were just told it was a normal reaction to his vaccinations!!!! Or maybe it was when I never paid attention to the fact that my son still was not walking and talking by 12 months old....... or mabye I never paid attention to his chronic constipation issues that has me giving him magnesium citrate in doses that would make a typical kid his age poop in minutes, takes my son days to poop. Or perhaps its when I'm not paying attention to all the eczema out breaks he has, where I have bought every lotion, ointment or cream on this planet that is recommended for it and NOTHING works, or maybe its when I'm not paying attention to the phone calls from school because he is having meltdowns about having to use a new picture schedule because it has a change in his routine for the day..........Ya your right, I'm not paying attention, that's why he has autism!

Frankly, I'm tired of people who think just because they can function in this life as a typical human being and they have the autism diagnosis that everyone else should not want to find a cure for their child.

Do they really honestly think any mom or dad who sees their child squirm in pain because they can't go to the bathroom, or scream for hours because they can't tell you what they need from you, any mom or dad would just accept what they see and have their child learn how to live with it? No a mom/dad is going to move heaven and earth to try and find a cure for what is ailing their child, which is exactly what we are doing!

Really, I have no time for people like this and I wish they would stop trying to speak for the children who really, desperately NEED A CURE!!!!

I wish.........

2010-03-22T23:47:00.002-06:00

I was talking to my nephew Nathan tonite about my boys. I was blessed enough to be able to help take care of Nathan when he was younger(wasn't he a cutie :) )

and be a part of his life growing up, and now, he has that same opportunity and is a part of my boys lives.

He reminded me in our conversation about something that happened today and I wanted to share it with you too :)............ Thank you Nate for our wonderful conversation tonite, luv ya!

There are days like today, where I wish so badly Handsome never would have had to be affected by autism. That he could have been a typical little boy, no cronic constipation, no horrible echzema, no AUTISM, just a happy healthy "typical" boy.......

But.....in the same sense I'm grateful for all the Lord has taught me. Because of it I never would have learned to cherish the small things with my boys. You have no idea (well, no some of you may :) ) how amazing it is for me to see Gabriel speak in sentences to me at barely 2 years old like today, he was talking to me about his silly binky " Mommy, its buu binky (blue)" and I started to cry, cause I realize (almost)everytime he speaks what a blessing it is!!! And I'm so grateful to the Lord!

Now on a side note :)
I took the boys to the park to play for a couple hours this weekend, it was beautiful out and they had a blast!!

Handsome, did some things he never would have been able to do just last year! He walked on this sidewalk beem with out any help and acted like it was no biggie... JUST a year ago that NEVER would have been possible.... Just another accomplishment for Handsome!! Way to go Bud!!!!

Then Handsome helped Mommy and pushed his brother on the swings!!!!

And Littleman well I have no idea what he was doing in this picture, but it sure is cute :)

Much Love Always,

I'm reminded of ...

2010-03-19T23:48:00.004-06:00

Tonight, as I was getting the boys ready for bed, we went through our nightly routine. Bathtime, hair combed, jammies on , stories read..... and then it was time for bed...........

Well this Handsome to the left <------, was not at all happy about going to bed (nor has he been lately :) ) I heard what I have heard for the past few nights, arguing with me........... Mommy no, one more book..... no bedtime.......... read the Dinasour book........ over and over and over again..... and like any Mommy, I started to get stern and say No Handsome, its time for bed, go to your room!........ and then I stopped myself quickly, and realized............ he's doing something a typical little boy would do.....protesting the fact that he has to go to bed!

Its moments like these, that I am so grateful for, the little moments.......even the ones where for a moment I forget and I am reminded of how special those moments are :)

I love you Handsome and I'm so proud of you! Even when you argue with me :)

Much Love,

Ya for the DAN Dr. appt!!!!

2010-03-15T23:43:00.005-06:00

Tomorrow Handsome has a long over due DAN appt with Dr.Schneider :) I can't tell you enough how wonderful she is to my son! She is the first doctor who has ever directly spoken to my son and told him, we're gonna help you feel alot better.... and ya wanna know something??? THEY HAVE!!!!!!

Handsome has lost so much weight and the bloating in his tummy from the yeast overgrowth is so minimal now its amazing!!! He talks so much more than he ever has before and I can't wait to get him his chelation/glutathion treatment tomorrow. Each time he has it he does so well and connects so much more to everyone around him! Its not a coincidence friends, its because the treatments work!

I'm so glad I researched and found out about biomedical treatments! It has done so much for Handsome and his road to recovery. I continue to have so much hope for him and his future, for with out Hope... what is there :)

Just wanted to share a quick video of Handsome before we ever knew he had autism. Looking back now I can see the echolalia he did, he constantly repeated one word over and over and over again and of course now I know they were signs of autism.

Now when I look at this video, I'm reminded of how far he has come. We are all so proud of you Handsome!! You have worked so hard to get where you are today, we love you so much and can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for your hope filled future!!!

Much love,

Long time .... no post :)

2010-03-15T00:04:00.000-06:00

I know I haven't posted in a few weeks... but school and the boys and life in general have been a whirlwind lately :).... LOTS has gone on with Handsomes progress/or not so much progress :) I will definitely be updating SOON about it. Until then I will leave you with some precious pictures of my boys!

OH YEAH I almost forgot to tell you!!!
I am very excited as I will be getting a bit of a facelift for my blog :) Can't wait to get everything set and done with the lovely lady I have chosen to do my blog :)

I hope you all are doing well! Can't wait to get back to reading all your blogs and updates!

Much Love,

YOU CAN Help :-)

2010-02-27T13:06:00.001-07:00

Hi friends and family :)

I know you have all heard of Extreme Home Makeover and I wanted to see if you all would be willing to take a moment out of your day today to copy and past this email and send it for my friend Michele and her husband.

She is a mother of three boys who have autism and I can't think of a more deserving family to receive this wonderful blessing! I remember when my son was first diagnosed with autism, I watched the video of her and Katie Wright and many other parents of children with autism over and over again.... I remember how great it felt to know there were moms like her out there. She gave me hope at a moment in time when I felt none at all for my son.... So today I would LOVE to be able to help her family out :)

Would you take a moment to send out an email for them and then pass it on to your friends and family and ask them to do the same as well? It only takes a minute :)

Cut and paste and send to: CASTLONGISLAND@GMAIL.COM

Dear Extreme Home Makeover:

I know you’ve gotten several emails about the Iallonardi family of Haupaugge, LI.

Autism affects 1 in 110 kids today and is always in the news. The Iallonardi’s are the PERFECT LI family for your program with 3 boys with autism. Please cast them.

Thank you!

Sincerely,
Your name here

PRESS RECORD.....

2010-02-21T20:13:00.002-07:00

Today while driving in the van, I decided to prop my camera up in the sunglass holder and press record... This is what I caught on video :) Handsome LOVES the Jackson 5 as well as his little brother :) It makes me smile from ear to ear to see him singing and doing things I never imagined he would be able to do once I heard the words autism :) Thank you God for giving us this blessing :) Much Love,

Struck by the awesome love of God

2010-02-18T22:54:00.000-07:00

I am a follower of Bring the Rain blog written by Angie Smith.

For those of you who do not know her, she is a wonderful woman of God and her husband is in the gospel group Selah. They have a new song out called "Unredeemed"...

She posted a video and I was speechless as it moved me to my very core as it spoke to me about many different things that have happened to me in my life. I wanted to share it with you, my readers, I hope it speaks to you as well. Please follow this link and listen.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfGbcjCVDOs

Blessings and Love

The glorious terrible twos!!!

2010-02-18T00:03:00.000-07:00

Boy oh boy have the terrible twos arrived at our house!!!!

I tell people this all the time " I believe God gave us Handsome first, to prepare us for Littleman :) "

LOL There really were no terrible twos with Handsome... he was always just a little harder to take care of than other kiddos, but there was no biting, or taking toys from other kids.... no trying to tackle older siblings :)no running away from Mommy at the park or trying to climb on top of chairs and ride them down the slide at home :), no getting into the potted plants and eating the soil and throwing all over the house......

Now don't get me wrong, we had our challeges with Handsome, but those were a whole different realm of troubles.... But lately, big brother is MUCH easier to take care of than little one :)

But either way it goes.... this Momma is every so happy, to meet the terrible two's!
I keep reminding myself what a blessing it is to have a typical little boy :) too know he has been saved from autism and he will not have to struggle the way his older brother has...

Its just hard to remember that when he flushes his train down his dads toilet :)

We love you Little man!!!

Wonderful World of Disney :)

2010-02-14T23:43:00.001-07:00

You guessed it, we took the kids to Disneyland this week for their birthdays! All three birthdays are with in the same week!

We had a fabulous time!!!! Handsome did so well, and get this............. he went on Space Mountain and LOVED IT!!! He also went on the Dumbo ride with his sister and loved that too :)

The best part about the trip to Disney for Handsome was that he was picked to dance with Pluto in the Main street parade at Disneyland!!!! See how much fun he had!!!!

The parade is a must if you go to Disneyland, it was fabulous and we had front row seats :)

And me, well I was just so happy to see him be able to enjoy it!!! Three years ago, this never would have been possible to do with him. He has come so far and I am so grateful for that :)

I enjoyed every part of the trip, including these beautiful tulips at Disneyland :)

Matthias is 6 !!!!!!!!!

2010-02-08T00:41:00.000-07:00

On February 6th my Handsome had his golden birthday at turned 6 years old!!!! I can hardly believe it! It seems as if the last three years have just flown by even quicker than normally, but being in the world of autism can tend to do that to ya :)

This week I have two more birthdays to celebrate as well :) Gabriel (Littleman) will be 2!!!! and Drem will be 13.... And BOY oh BOY do we have a suprise for these kiddos! I will definitely post more about it later this weekend :).

We decided to take the kids up north yesterday, this was their first time playin in the snow :) So I thought I would post some pictures for you to see how much fun they had :) ENJOY!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDSOME! I love you and I am so proud of all you have accomplished!

Even Thomas made the trip :)

Much Love,

My thought for the day......

2010-02-02T16:44:00.001-07:00

The unfortunate truth about autism is that our government refuses to do the research that is needed. They would rather a whole generation of children just disappear, and they are hoping that someday we will just be quiet..... only problem is :) parents never tend to shut up when they chilldrens lives are at stake :)

Please vote! Chase the Hope for Autism

2010-01-16T23:17:00.001-07:00

Hi friends,

Just a quick note to say... could you please vote for this wonderful group that supports families with children with autism. Just take one moment :) Do it for me.... do it for Matthias :)

Help share the Hope by Chasing the Hope for Autism :)

Please vote! Chase the Hope for Autism

Thanks so much!

WOW...

2010-01-01T13:28:00.000-07:00

I can hardly believe its 2010!!!!

(First Christmas Eve He has ever smiled for me when I asked!)

(Christmas Day playing with toys!)

10 years ago I had no children and was moving to another state for the first time in my life.....

I can't believe 10 years have gone by, where does all the time go?

This time of year always brings a little sadness for me as I hate to see the Christmas season disappear around me. I love this time of year and can't wait each year for it to begin. I guess growing up in a big family we have always had LOTS of traditions and it always made this time of year special. Now that I have children it makes this time of year even more special for me.

Today, on the first day of the New Year as I look ahead to try and glimpse at our future, I am praying for so many wonderful things to happen for my children and I. God has truelly blessed us this year, with all of our friends and family. I can't begin to tell you all how wonderful it has been to have your support during the last 5 years especially.

Handsome continues, to make progress but at this time, is having some difficulty :(... and so it goes on the roller coaster of Autism. I am still, even after three years, learning how to recover from the ups and downs of autism. BUT, I am looking forward to getting him back in to see his DAN! doctor in just a few weeks for me chelation/glutathion..

Littleman is trucking along with the rest of us and is progressing just as he should be :) NO delays and talking up a storm! It brings me such joy to know he is developing just as he should be :) This Christmas it has been so much fun to see him enjoy all the wonderful memories. HE LOVES Frosty the Snowman and loves to sing, Frosty and Feliz Navidad :) TO CUTE! I'm posting the video of him singing on this blog later so please come back and take a moment to see it :)

To all of my readers, friends and family.... Thank you! So much for all you have done for my family this year! We love you so much and are praying you have a blessed and prosperous New year!

Much Love,

Little did I know.....

2009-12-22T07:53:00.000-07:00

Autism has been creeping up on me my whole life!!!
I have read these stats so many times I can't count in the last 3 years, but today when I related them to my own life experiences it hit me in the stomach so hard I lost my breath!

Please friends, pass on this information and do the same if you can... relate it to what was happening in your life during that year.

1975 #of autism cases,1 in 5000 children.(1yr after I WAS BORN!)

1985 #of autism cases,1 in 2500 children.(1yr b4 my niece Elysha was born)

1995 #of autism cases,1 in 500 children.(2yrs after I graduated high school)

2001 #of autism cases,1 in 250 children.(The worst attack on our Nation)

2004 #of autism cases,1 in 166 children.(The year Handsome ws Diag.)

2007 #of autism cases,1 in 150 children.(1yr before Littleman was born)

2009 #of autism cases,1 in 110 children(Year Handsome started biomed Treatment!)

Much Love,

Pictures at the park!

2009-12-21T13:56:00.000-07:00

Believe it or not, FALL is just starting here in Phoenix... I took the boys to a special park yesterday with their Daddy and took pictures! We had a fabulous time! Got lots of cute pictures of the boys here are some of my favorites!

I hope you all are having a wonderful week! Only 4 days till Christmas!!!

We had such a great time yesterday! I love living in AZ in the Winter such perfect temps and great photo ops too!!

Much love to you and your families at Christmas time!

Its the most wonderful time of the year!!!!!

2009-12-17T12:55:00.001-07:00

Wow I can't believe I haven't posted in so long! Life has been crazy busy with my boys :) I'm not sure where to start on Handsomes progress, but to simply say..... He has gained LEAPS AND BOUNDS this year!!!

We have had our ups and downs on the roller coaster ride of autism (especially this month) BUT I am so excited that Handsome is going to be able to get more treatments very soon! He does so well after getting Chelation/ Glutathion treatments, so much that after it goes through his system you can see a noticable difference in him.

I can't begin to tell you what a wonderful Christmas it has been so far, Handsome and Littleman have had LOTS of fun going to look at lights and going to the train park to see Santa (pictures to come shortly). Its amazing how different my Handsome is this year compared to last year. Here is a picture of my Handsome with his brother and cousins from Christmas Eve last year :

Notice how my niece is having to hold him still for the picture, my poor baby looks so sick :( When my sister first posted this picture I cried... You can see how miserable he looks.....

Now here is a picture from this month of my handsome decorating the christmas tree:

This is the first time in his life that he has been able to decorate the tree !!!!! He wanted to help!!!!!!

I can't tell you how happy that made this Momma!!!

And here is another one of him posing with his Daddys Santa hat on :

I cant begin to tell you how grateful I am to the Lord for all He is doing in both of my childrens lives! He has provided us with the funds to beable to take Handsome to a FABULOUS DAN! Dr.Schneider is such a wonderful person and doctor and I am forever grateful for how wonderful she is with my son, not to mention how wonderful her Staff is as well!

Handsome has his ups and downs but he is so much better than he was last year!

And Littleman well he is talking up a storm and already going through the terrible twos (he's not two until February). But I am so happy that my Littleman is developmentally right on schedule! That brings joyous tears to my eyes!

I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas this year! Make as many memories with your family as you can :)!

Much Love,

Missing in Action

2009-12-12T16:26:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone! Sorry I have been missing for a few weeks, life has been crazy with finals this week, but now its over :)... I have lots of things to tell you about Handsome, but not enough time at this moment...

Right now I wanted to share with you an article one of my blog Mommas wrote for the Age Of Autism... Oh The Places You'll Go.... Please read it... its talks about the things we never dreamed would happen and the sacrifices we have made...

http://www.ageofautism.com/2009/12/oh-the-places-youll-go.html

Much Love,

Its official!!! The site for the project is up :)

2009-11-21T16:50:00.002-07:00

Hi Friends :)

The new blog for the Project I started (thanks to my friends idea :) ) is up :) its still in the beginning stages but please visit it and participate if you have a child with autism :) Pass on the news too!

Much Love,

http://autismb4nafterproject.blogspot.com/

Today is.....

2009-11-14T16:29:00.000-07:00

My birthday, and for the first time in 5 years...... my Handsome said Happy Birthday to me when I woke up!.... and he remembered all on his own from when his Grani told him the night before......

Of course like always with the miracles with Handsome... I cried...... I cried because the Lord is continually giving me little miracles and big ones each day.... and today, well that little miracle ment so much to me!

I'm so grateful to the Lord for what he is doing in my childrens lives, yes He is doing miracles even with my Littleman, you see he is 21 months old and has no signs of autism at all :) by this time in my Handsomes life he had many, many signs of it, and Littleman is developing right on schedule.... For this I am forever grateful to the Lord :)

To all my beautiful friends and family, thank you so much for loving me and my children, and thank you for making me feel so special today!

I love you all so much!
With MUCHO LOVE :)

This song ...

2009-11-12T00:02:00.000-07:00

Since the beginning of this journey of hope to recovery for my son, I have clung to what (at sometimes was little) faith I have that the Lord will take care of my son(s). This was a hard thing for me at times, because it took me so long to have that type of faith again, the kind that can move mountains again ( 5 years to be exact).

When I first heard this song, I was moved to tears.... I feel like it is speaking of the last 5 years of my life, especially this past year.... I HAVE seen miracles happen before my eyes, and I am so grateful to the Lord for giving me those miracles in my son. I went from no hope in ever seeing my son talking, to watch my son climb and play with other children at the play ground just like a 'typical' little boy...

Please watch the new video I created for everyone to see just how far my Handsome has come! It is located right above this post :)

Really and trully this IS what faith CAN do!
I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

What Faith Can Do

By Kutless

From the album It Is Well

Everybody falls sometimes

Gotta find the strength to rise

From the ashes and make a new beginning

Anyone can feel the ache

You think it’s more than you can take

But you are stronger, stronger than you know

Don’t you give up now

The sun will soon be shining

You gotta face the clouds

To find the silver lining

I’ve seen dreams that move the mountains

Hope that doesn’t ever end

Even when the sky is falling

And I’ve seen miracles just happen

Silent prayers get answered

Broken hearts become brand new

That’s what faith can do

It doesn’t matter what you’ve heard

Impossible is not a word

It’s just a reason for someone not to try

Everybody’s scared to death

When they decide to take that step

Out on the water

It’ll be alright

Life is so much more

Than what your eyes are seeing

You will find your way

If you keep believing

I’ve seen dreams that move the mountains

Hope that doesn’t ever end

Even when the sky is falling

And I’ve seen miracles just happen

Silent prayers get answered

Broken hearts become brand new

That’s what faith can do

Overcome the odds

You do have a chance

(That’s what faith can do)

When the world says you can’t

It’ll tell you that you can!

I’ve seen dreams that move the mountains

Hope that doesn’t ever end

Even when the sky is falling

And I’ve seen miracles just happen

Silent prayers get answered

Broken hearts become brand new

That’s what faith can do

That's what faith can do!

Even if you fall sometimes

You will have the strength to rise

Label: BEC Recordings

Much Love!

He would have been 7 today.......

2009-11-08T23:01:00.000-07:00

Summer of 2002 I found out I was pregnant with my first child very early on at about 3 months. I was met with many obsticles because I was a single woman and the 'shame' I felt because of it. But I never let my status affect my decision in keeping my child. I continued to work and anticipated what life would be like with a child. Then at 9 weeks I woke up to go to work and was bleeding excessively. I woke my mother and called my sisters and we went to the doctors office. I called my boyfriend on the way and he met us there. I was so scared and unsure of what was going on, and thought that I had lost my baby. I went back to the room by myself and they checked me, and when I looked at the ultrasound, I saw the heartbeat... the baby was still alive and my cervix was still completely closed :)... I was put on stricked bedrest and told to call if I had anymore bleeding.

From then on I went to see my doctor twice a week where they checked me regularly to make sure the baby and I were okay. All during this time, I was still bleeding on and off every week. It was such a scary thing to go through, one time I bleed so badly and had past (sorry to be so blunt) a huge clot I thought for sure it was the baby. So much that my doctor told me to bring it in with me to the ER (it was nighttime) I went to the ER gave them the remains and they took me back to get an ultrasound.. once again, my beautiful baby was still there :) heartbeating and legs kicking :)... I went back to the room and they discharged me stating that I probably was loosing the baby and nothing could be done. I went home only to discover they threw my specimin away and never checked it to see what exacty it was. To this day my doctor agrees with me and thinks I was carrying twins.

I was on bedrest for three months, with one time where I thought I was okay and they released me to go back to work. Only to be put on bedrest that same day of returning becasue I started to bleed again at work. On November 5th 2002 I went in to get an extensive ultrasound because my test results had come back saying they baby may have spina bifida. My boyfriend and I went in and were told there wasn't enough fluid around the baby. The tech had the doctor come in and he told us that the baby would not survive and that I should go and see my doctor. I went to the rest room and started to bleed heavily again. I told my doctor and he continued to tell us that I would be unlikely that I wouldn't start to bleed again tonight. If that did happen I would have to go to the hospital tonight. In fact that is what happened, as much as I prayed and pleaded and cried with God that whole day, it still happened anyway.

I called my boyfriend and told him we were on our way up there, and my sister D took me. They got me situated and settled into a bed in OB Triage. Once I was there I called my doctor and told her I was there. She was so wonderful to me(its always good to have a friend as a doctor) she had just gotten home but she turned around and came back in to be with me. The got the ultrasound and checked on me and my baby and discovered that my uterus was slowly pulling away.

Silence.............and then I heard the words I will never forget.... Your going to have to deliver your baby or you will die...................WHAT?!?! I can't have my baby, they won't make it, there to small at 19 weeks..... Can't we just wait a few more weeks? If we could wait a few more weeks they will have a better chance of surviving.....Why do I have to have them now? I don't even know if I'm having a boy or a girl yet?

All of it was so heart wrenching and numbing, I couldn't believe this was happening to me. Why me? I made the right choice, I didn't try to get rid of my baby but now your taking them from me? WHY?

I waited until Glenn got there and asked him to help me make this decision I can't do it by myself. This is your baby too... He told me what I needed to hear after talki wbgith my doctor, and he was right. As much as I knew I didn't want to, I had to or I would die. Its such an awful decision to make, your life? Or your childs, or worse yet both of us?

I okayed it and they started me on some pretty harsh meds, which started the WORST contractions I have ever felt. They never stopped, it was just one constant contraction. They gave me an epidural and I was okay as far as pain wise then. This went on for three days and during those three days, I cried and pleaded to have them do an ultrasound again. But was told over and over, he would not survive the process and they don't want to upset me anymore than I was already. My wonderful friends and family were with me and my boyfriend the whole time, supporting us and crying with me.

I gave birth to a boy, my first born son Keane Michael on 11-9-2002 at 6:12pm, five days before my 26th birthday. He was the only child I was ever able to give birth to vaginally, he was so small, so precious and so alive! He was born alive, and lived a precious 6 1/2 hours.We were able to hold him and kiss him, and tell him how much he was loved. We baptised him and took pictures with him. Our family and friends came in one by one and held him and loved him.....At the time we didnt know about the wonderful places like Now I lay Me Down To Sleep. But the staff at the hospital was so great! They took digital pictures of him and took polariods of us holding him. I cherrish the pictures, and to this day I cry over them. I grieve for what would have been, but know, with out a doubt Keane is being loved even more than I could love him in Heaven with our Savior.

Although it was 7years ago today that my preicous little boy was born, I still feel the pain and cry for my son everyday. I grieve for what could have been, I so badly wanted him here with me.... and on this day of his 7th birthday day.... I will cry for my son, but I will also be thankful for the hours we had with him here on earth, and I"m thankful that I know I will see him again someday.

On his tombstone it reads:
"Some people only dream of Angels, We held one in our arms" How true that statement is to me...

I love you Keane! Happy Birthday Son!

Much love,

So excited to introduce to you.....

2009-11-05T10:43:00.002-07:00

Yesterday a wonderful friend of mine, had a GREAT idea! Why don't we create a 'wall' of sorts to show pictures of our kids... before autism, after autism, and if they are recovered or are recovering.

Well friends I thought this was a FABULOUS idea!!! So I started on creating a Facebook Page to connect with other parents to be able to get the picutres. I titled this great idea " Autism B4 N After Project".
If you are on Facebook, please become a fan of ours, I have a link on this blog for you to be able to find us.

What I will be doing, is receiving pictures of as many children with autism as I can, and putting their pictures up with their names and information (before, after and recovering) on a blog site. I am currently in the process of making this blog and downloading pics so I can put them up. As you can imagine, this is still a spare of the moment effort, so I am still trying to figure everything out on what the page should look like and so on. So please any ideas from my friends are appreciated!

If you would like to voluntarily participate in the project, please send me your pictures and information too :
Autismb4nafterproject@gmail.com.

And please :) Pass on this blog post or facebook page to others you know may want to join in!
I will keep you all posted on how things are going, I am so excited about this project and can't wait to see how many kiddos we will get to add to our 'wall'.

Also, this will be an on going effort, so I will be adding pictures whenever I receive them :) I want to be able to update the page weekly with new pictures.

This page will give us parents a way to show others, autism just didn't happen because of poor diagnosing, we watched it occur before our eyes and you can see it in the pictures, that blank stare, knowing the effort it took for us to try to get them to even look our way if we by chance snapped the photo in time. One moment our child was typical, doing what they should and the next they were not, or worse yet, right after birth it happened.

So far I have had a huge response, and it is wonderful to get to know all of you! In the same sense its so heart wrenching to know that all these pictures I am receiving are families, just like mine, who are traveling the same road and my heart aches for all of us. I hope in some way this page will give us a place to remember and rejoice in the recovery process.

Please feel free to let me know if you have any ideas on the page.

Much Love,

What a difference !!

2009-11-02T20:37:00.000-07:00

As most of you know, my Handsome started his chelation last Monday and I have seen LOTS and LOTS of progress since then.

A few examples are as follows :) :

He constantly is playing pretend, one day he was playing Dr.Matthias and going around the house checking everyone this is how it went

" Hi Mommy, I'm Dr. Matthias, I'm going to get you a check up. Let me listen to your breathing," He put the play stethescope up to me, pretended to listen and said " Very, good job Mommy, your all good" and on to the next person.....

WOW!!! Really? Did that really just happen??? My son has NEVER played pretend with me like this ever!!!!! This is HUGE!

Another example :

We are watching Ice Age Dawn of the Dinosaurs, and he is laughing hysterically in parts of the movie where you SHOULD laugh! and telling me " Ha ha ha, Mommy that was funny, Sid dropped it!"

Another example :

I asked him yesterday " Matthias, get your shoes me, you and your brother are gonna go bye bye" and he says " No Mommy, I don't wanna go, I wanna stay here"

HUH?! ? He has never told me he doesn't want to go bye bye, he made a real choice by feeling?!?!

On Halloween he didnt have a meltdown and cry non stop, he was excited to go trick or treating, and said trick or treat everytime we went up to a door, and said thank you.... he held his aunts hand and never ONCE tried to run away!!! He had a great time!!! 2 or 3 years ago all my son did at Halloween when we tried to take him door to door was cry hysterically, we barely went to two houses. Whenever anyone would approach him, he would get scared and try and run... this year he's a completely different child!

These are just examples I can think of off the top of my head and they have all happened since we started chelation. Do I think this is a coincidence HECK NO!!! Now that he can get rid of the toxic harmful metals ( Arsenic, lead, cadmeium, mercury) from his body, his cells can provide the right amount of oxygen to his body, and the inflammation in his belly is going down!!!

WOW!!! WHAT A DIFFERENCE BIO MEDICAL TREATMENTS HAVE MADE FOR MY BEAUTIFUL HANDSOME SON!!!

Can't thank the people who have helped us enough! How do you thank the people that are helping your child recover from autism? I haven't quit figured that out yet, but I will say thank you a billion times over to all of them!

Much Love and Thanks :)

Lisa

You called me Dude :) ... And Parent teacher conference

2009-10-29T20:32:00.000-06:00

Tonight, I went in to meet with Handsomes teacher Miss B. This was my first parent teacher conference with her, although I speak with her fairly frequently :). I knew we would go over his IEP goals to see where he was at and I was looking forward it. Needless to say, ONCE again , I was blown away by the progress he has made.

All the goals he struggled with BIG TIME just a few months ago, he has mastered!!! For example, he has never been able to walk down the stairs with out holding onto the railing let alone remember to look down.... sure enough, he has mastered it... I wasn't sure about it so tonight I tested him myself :) lol he DOES IT!!! HOLY COW!!!! Not to mention all the other goals he has masterd, and made significant progress on. She also commented on how fun he is to have in her class, that he is so social and loves to talk to people.

We also, talked about what things to work on, like his self help skills. I struggles with being able to dress himself completely, he can only do a portion of it so they will be working on that along with some other goals we spoke about. Then we talked about him going into the typical Kindergarten class for a few hours a day. His teacher and I spoke at length about this and she really feels that my Handsome, will eventually be mainstreamed into a typical class room setting!!!

HOLY SMOKES BATMAN!!!! DID YOU JUST SAY MAINSTREAM CLASSROOM????????

I told her, this is every parents dream!! To see their child, who has struggled his whole life with autism, to be told that he will eventually be mainstreamed into a TYPICAL CLASSROOM!!!! Right now at this moment I am crying, just thinking about the fact that my little boy, who just three years ago was diagnosed with autism, will possibly be in a mainstream class!!! I'm so very proud of him!!!!

I'll keep you all posted on when he starts going into the typical class for a few hours a day!

Now, tonight as my Handsome and I are getting him ready for bed, he's talking my ear off about getting to go to the fair tomorrow! And how fun it will be to see all the animals. He then says I love you dude, so I in return said " I love you to DUDE" and he does the cutest thing and says through his laughing " Your funny Mommy, You called me DUDE"

Wow what a joy it is for this Mommy to see just how amazing the biomedical treatments are working for him!!! Thank you God that I was introduced to it and Lend4health and that we were lead to a the best DAN doctor around! As usual, words can't even express to anyone, just how blessed I feel.... its so amazing to see where My Handsome has come from.

My goal this month for myself is to put a new video together, to be able to show you just how much progress he's made!

Much love!

A Quick Post with HUGE NEWS!!!

2009-10-26T23:00:00.000-06:00

First off, I have to say, Handsome started his first round of chelation, glutathione and vitamin C IV and he did SUPER!!! I was shocked at how well he did!!! He has another next week and I will keep you posted on progress :) Now on to the bigger news :)

Today, Handsomes teacher told me she wants to put him in the ............

TYPICAL kindergarten class for a few hours a day. She said he is so far along socially that he needs to be around more typical children to bloom his skills even further :)

WAIT A SECOND...........SAY WHAT ?!?!?!?! HOLD ON ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT MY SON???

What I really did was cry when she told me, then continued to talk to her about his social skills and about all the other things he does need to work on in their class... but friends please..... listen to this Momma tell you something.................

I can vividly remember crying to my friends about how afraid I was that my Handsome would never talk or be able to play with other children the way a "typical" child should, and now..... 3 years later from the Month of his diagnoses I have people telling me how much he talks. How they get such a kick out of him at school, because he knows everyones names and talks to them each day. How he interacts with them at recess, and HE approaches them to play!!! These things, I was told, would most likely not happen............

BUT THEY ARE :) and I can't express to you how happy that makes me! My Handsome is coming through that window of autism :) and my heart is filled with JOY and gratitude!!!!

I know the Lord is seeing us through this all, and I'm amazed at how good He is to us. I will never forget the kindness of friends and strangers who have helped my son be able to go on this Journey of Hope :) ..... I can't wait to tell you about more progress every day!

Much Love,

The GURU :)

2009-10-25T11:07:00.000-06:00

I have been sick this past week so I haven't been able to blog as I had planned on. Lots will be taking place this week as my Handsome starts his first round of Chelation, glutithione and Vitamin C on Monday. I am cautiously excited about it... now when I say cautiously, its not because I am scared of the procedure, its because I don't want to get my hopes up and be to excited about the possibilities of more progress being made. So instead I opt for realisim, which is much more like me...

Because I was sick this week, I was not able to go to one of my dearest and best friends birthday parties, who I will refer to as 'R' last night :( I was completely bummed out about it. Seeing as I rarely ever get a chance to go out let alone, go to an 'Adult' outing :)lol..... I was looking forward to seeing others I had not seen in awhile and also to meeting a few, I have only ever met over the phone or through FB (Facebook). But my beautiful sister 'D' was able to attend, so I heard about the party and how great it was and all the people who came. She also got to meet the one person I had looked forward to meeting, as she is a Mommy just like me :) an Autism Momma..

I was honored to get to talk with her over the phone after her child was first diagnosed. I got to do what I do best, pass on information that was given to me... I really love to be able to pass on what I know and what I have gone through, I suppose that is why I am going into Social Work so that I can work with families of children with autism :).

Anyway, my sister got to talk with her and she said she was looking forward to meeting, the "Autism Goddess Guru" lol isn't that the coolest title :) lol... Now mind you I don't look at myself like that at all, but lately I have been given a few titles, one I will not mention as its not a very nice name, then I was called the "Autism nazi" hmmm i wasn't so sure about that one.... could be good, could be bad... and now " Autism Goddes Guru" I think I will keep that title :) I like it!

Thanks 'T' Your to kind!

Since the day my Handsome was diagnosed with autism, my life has been quickly and profoundly changed forever. Because of these changes our lives will never be the same again, which I am eternally grateful for. Not because I want my child to have autism, but because it has taught me so much along the way on this Journey of autism. I want to help others walk through what I have gone through and I hope I am alittle bit of help to others.

Well I have alot to do today and not alot of time to do it in.

Much Love from

the 'Autism Goddess Guru' lol

Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

2009-10-15T22:26:00.000-06:00

Remembering my first born son Keane Michael

Born 11/09/02 at 19 weeks gestation

Weight 8.4 oz

Delivered into Heaven - 11/10/02

He lived for a precious 6 1/2 hours

You will forever be in my heart precious!

I love you Forever!!!

Blog Hop - Anything that makes you feel good :)

2009-10-13T20:27:00.001-06:00

I'm a little late on this weeks blog hop, but had to do it :) This picture definitely makes me feel good, who doesn't love a picture of their kids showing how much they love eachother :) Awwwww

Replace this sentence with your content, do not remove any code past this sentence.

Your son has autism......

2009-10-13T12:51:00.000-06:00

Today marks the day of my Handsomes 3 year diagnoses of Autism.... (deep breath)

Its a very bitter sweet day for me and I thought I would write a little about that day.

I clearly remember all the work it took to even get him the diagnosis of what was wrong with him, all along hoping and praying it wasn't the big 'A'. I had heard of autism, but didn't know anyone with a child who had it. We ruled out hearing loss, and a few other developmental disorders that it possibly could be and then started with AZ Early Intervention, they came in evaluated him, talked to me and then told us we needed to go and see a Psychologist to get him evaluated. The big day was Friday, October 13, 2006.

Handsomes Dad and I loaded him up in the car and drove to the Psychologists office. We waited in the waiting room for what seemed like hours. It was the same routine I had been through SO many times already, 'Fill out this paper work, stating all his history from birth to current, along with all of my history, his dads history, and all the information about my pregnancies and so on and so forth. After filling out the 15 page booklet :) we went back.
She was a very nice lady and while we were in their she asked us lots of questions while she watched our son play. She pointed out things to me, that I never noticed before, like... " You see how he plays with those blocks, he doesn't play with them the way a child should, he picks them up looks at them and then throws them"

After many questions and lots of pointing out of what our son is doing. She sat back and asked me, "How long have you thought something may be wrong?" and I told her " Since he was about 15 months old"

And then she said it, " Unfortunatley, I see alot of this lately...." pause " Have you ever heard of autism?"

My heart sank " Yes.." and then she said it " Your son has autism.... I would put him in the category of Severe to Moderate, seeing as he is so young he may be able to make some progress" " Unfortunatly , there is no cure, with time and therapy he might be able to make some progress and talk, but I can't say for sure what kind of progress he will make. I can tell you that the more intervention you get for him the better it may get."

Throgh the fog of crying I heard what she was saying, but was so overcome with fear, grief and disappointment for my son. We sat and listened to her, and took all the paperwork she had for us and she walked us down the hall. I politely excused myself to the restroom, where I completely fell in to tears. All I could think of was " How can this be?" Why my son? Haven't we struggled enough already? Why does Handsome have to struggle? What will we do?

I tried desperatly to hold it together for my son, I didn't want to upset him.I was so glad his dad was there cause he was so good with Handsome.... AS I was about to walk through the door, I heard the Doctor tell his dad, this is going to be a rough road, some children progress a little further, but most don't.... you will walk through alot of feelings, and its okay that she is upset, let her work through it, I"m sorry this has happened, and she left.

I dried my eyes and walked out and held it together, We really didnt say much on the ride home as we both were in shock of it all. Glenn tried his best to reassure me it would be okay and if I needed him he would stay, but I knew he needed to go to work.

I dropped his dad off, drove down the street parked the car in a grocery store parking lot and called my sister. I remember when she answered the phone I could barely speak, she heard me crying and said " Are you okay? What did they say? Do you need me to come and get you?"

I finally was able to form the words. " Handsome has autism" She told me to come to her store and she would meet me outside, she did and she comforted me and told me it would be okay. I'm so blessed to have such a caring, loving family, they were all there for me (again) when I needed them. After crying for along time, I calmed myself down and drove to my sisters house, where all my family was. They loved on me and Handsome and talked with me and told me what I needed to hear, we will work this out, and Handsome will progress.

Now three years later, it feels like I have been on this Journey so much longer. When your child has autism, it takes lots of time and dedication on your end to find out how you can recover your child. Thankfully, after making the decision to quit my fulltime job and dedicate everything to Handsome, I did start to see progress. The first thing to go was Casein, we did start to see progress! Thats when he started to talk, and it just progressed from there. I continued to read everything I could get my hands on about autism and biomedical intervention. The more I read the more it made sense for my son to start doing more of it.

Deciding to get Handsome 'biomedical' intervention is the best and most important thing I have done to start to recover my son! I am so grateful to everyone who has ever helped my son, for if not for you, he would NOT be where he is today, 3 years later and STILL RECOVERING!

Much Love,

Coming Through The Window...

2009-10-05T14:39:00.001-06:00

****UPDATE***** Since I posted this my Handsome had his Monday appointment with his HAB worker J. He worked on playing with his playdough with him and making animals and then of course went to the playground.

When they returned 1 hour later (thats typical) his HAB worker was floored. He told me " Your right, he is making so much progress" "Everytime I see him in the past month he is gaining more and more skills."

Now, here is what he said that blew me away " He did fantastic at the park, he played with the boys and girls, and I didn't have to help him play with them, I just sat there and supervised him to make sure he was okay!"

Typically he would have to help him interact with the kids, and even then he would look kinda awkward while playing with them, as he really didn't know how to play appropriatly. But not today :)!!! And He commented on how much weight he has lost!!!

Oh this Momma is brimming from ear to ear with Pride for my Handsome!!!! YIPPPEEEE~!!!!!
Its amazing the progress handsome has made, you wouldn't even recognize him sometimes....he's such a different kid alot of the time now, he just comes up to me and says totally age appropriate things !

Where in the heck did that come from? Is usually the response in my head :) He has never ever done things like this before!!!

For instance I said to him when he was walking down the hall out of the living room" Are you going in the bathroom to go pee again?" and He says " No Mommy I'm closing the door"!! And sure enough, thats what he did and came right back into the living room.

WHAT?!?! Wait a second.....He answered me with more than just NO Mommy! He told me no, and what he was actually going to do and then....DID IT !!!

Then when his HAB worker Ashley came over, He ran up to her and told her " Look A, I lost my tooth"

HUH!?!?! Who is this kid!!! Not only can you see a change in him verbally, emotionally but also physically...see the picture, look how he doesn't have the HUGE circles under his eyes anymore! they are very small now and almost gone :) His tummy isn't bloated and hurting 24/7 anymore!

Its amazing to see because for the first time, in 5 years I am beginning to see really, who my Handsome is :) and it brings me to tears.

He's coming through, slowly but surely, he is coming through the window we call Autism.... and I can't tell you how grateful I am to have been able to get him all the treatments he needed to get him this far! Thank you to all my friends, family and lenders at Lend4Health. With out you this would not be happening!

So, stay tuned Friends! Its never a dull moment here, and I'm looking forward to many more!

Much Love,

Picture Day... and did I mention its finally Fall in AZ :)

2009-10-02T13:28:00.000-06:00

Today is picture day at school for Handsome! We had quite the decisions to make this morning.....which shirt do you want to wear? Well actually I guess its Mommy that had quite the decision to make :)( the Pictures are from this morning during our decision process :) )... Poor kid, I made him try on the two different shirts three times till finally he says to me " Mommy I want to wear the red one" Okay then! Red it is :)!!!

What a handsome little boy! I love that face! I can't wait to see how they turn out! Should make some pretty cute pictures to put in some ornaments I have!!! Did I mention, that its finally FALL HERE!!!!

Ya I know... its probably been Fall for you guys alot longer than me, but here in AZ, well it takes its time before it gets to be under 100 degrees.

I love, love, love this time of year! We don't have to be stuck in the house anymore for fear of heat stroke! We get to play in the cool air and enjoy the park again!!! Handsome and Littleman LOVE to go to the park!

Fall has always been my favorite time of year since I was a young child. I grew up playing outside in the leaves, spending holidays making home made goodies and anticipating the arrival of Christmas Eve.

My mom and I have already started our ornament painting, we started that many weeks ago, but now :) we have others joining us :) My nieces and my soon to be godson in law :) We're having a great time decorating and can't wait to sell them!

My niece E is going to sell them at her Cafe at church and the proceeds will go to purchase Handsomes supplements. She offered to do that for him, isn't that the sweetest thing? I love my family!

Arizonas weather is the best in the Fall and Winter! I have plans to take the boys to the park tomorrow :) and relish in the fact that I won't have to sweat to death :)!!!!!

What are your plans for the weekend?

Much Love,

Its MckLinky Blog hop time :)

2009-09-28T23:58:00.001-06:00

This week's blog hop theme is: 3 things every parent should teach their kids.

Do unto others as you would have done unto you. This is a big one for me, everyone deserves to be treated with respect. Treat others exactly the way you would want to be treated.
Family is forever, cherrish every moment you have with your family. We are never guaranteed how long we have with them
Always, Always, Always! Make sure you say " I love you" To the people you love. Its important that they know how much they mean to you. I never go to sleep with out saying I love you to my children :).

I can't wait to read everyone elses ideas :)

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Special thanks to Shoplet.com-Purell Hand Sanitizers for sponsoring this blog hop.